Bar Chart

Band 5+: The bar chart shows a number of overseas students enrolled in a third year computer science course at a Canadian college.

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The image depicts a bar chart detailing the number of male (M) and female (F) overseas students from six countries (Singapore, Malaysia, China, Sri Lanka, France) enrolled in third-year Computer Science courses (Networking core, Database core) at a Canadian college. Singapore: Networking - M (5), F (3); Database - M (3), F (1). Malaysia: Networking - M (4), F (2); Database - M (2), F (1). China: Networking - M (5), F (5); Database - M (1), F (2). Sri Lanka: Networking - M (4), F (2); Database - M (2), F (1). France: Networking - M (2), F (1); Database - M (1), F (1).

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‎The bar chart shows the number of male and female overseas students of five countries in a third year computer science course a Canadian college. The students could choose between networking and database potion. Overall chinese students are the largest group French students. Inthe most countries females preferred networking males selected database. In the China female in networking was the highest of all around whereas males mostly chose database in Sri Lanka where 8 femalesstudied networking compares database to fewer males. Singapore also showed more females in networking 7 then 5. In Malaysia both genders almost equal with around 4-7 students in total. By contrast France had the lowest figures overall with only 2-3 students in both categories. In summary China and Sri Lanka had the strongest female presence in Networking, while France had the weakest participation overall.

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Word Count: 140

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

students: 6

networking: 6

database: 4

female: 3

males: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task and attempts to summarise the main features of the bar chart. However, there are some inaccuracies and omissions in the data representation. The writing also lacks clarity and precision in places. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data, using precise language, and structuring the report more effectively with a clear overview, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear paragraphing and transitions, making it difficult to follow the main points. The organization of information could be improved by grouping similar data together and using cohesive devices to link ideas. For example, you could dedicate separate paragraphs to discussing overall trends, specific country comparisons, and gender preferences. Try to use more varied sentence structures to improve the flow.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, but there is room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. Consider using more specific terms to describe the data, such as 'predominantly,' 'significantly,' or 'marginally.' Also, avoid repeating the same words and phrases too frequently. For instance, instead of saying 'students in networking,' you could use 'networking students' or 'students enrolled in networking courses.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, article usage, and correct tense usage. For example, 'chinese students are the largest group French students' is grammatically incorrect and unclear. Also, ensure that sentences are complete and properly punctuated. Proofreading carefully before submitting your work can help identify and correct these errors.

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Band 5+: The bar chart shows a number of overseas students enrolled in a third year computer science course at a Canadian college.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The bar chart shows a number of overseas students enrolled in a third year computer science course at a Canadian college.

The bar chart shows a number of overseas students enrolled in a third year computer science course at a Canadian college.

The bar chart shows a number of overseas students enrolled in a third year computer science course at a Canadian college.

The bar chart shows a number of overseas students enrolled in a third year computer science course at a Canadian college.

Other Topics:

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The chart below gives information about the most common sports played in the UK in 2008

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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