Bar Chart

Band 5+: The bar chart shows the number of people employed in five types of work in one region of Australia in 2001 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons.

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Image for topic: The bar chart shows the number of people employed in five types of work in one region of Australia in 2001 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons.

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The image depicts employment figures in thousands for five job sectors in Australia for 2001 and 2008. In 2001, sales accounted for 1,900,000; computing, 750,000; accounting, 950,000; nursing, 350,000; and farming, 200,000. By 2008, sales decreased to 1,600,000; computing rose to 1,200,000; accounting declined to 900,000; nursing doubled to 700,000; and farming remained at 200,000.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The chart shows the number of people working in five different jobs in one area of Australia between 2001 and 2008.

Overall, sales employed the most people during this period, while farming had the fewest workers.

In 2001, sales was the largest job sector, with about 160,000 workers. Accounting, computing and nursing followed, with around 62,000, 60,000 and 58,000 employees respectively. Farming had the lowest number, with just over 20,000 people.

By 2008, the number of people working in sales increased slightly to about 162,000. Employment in computing and nursing also went up, reaching around 80,000 and 60,000. However, accounting and farming both saw a decrease in worker numbers. Even so, accounting still had about three times more workers than farming.

Word Count: 121

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

farming: 4

number: 3

people: 3

sales: 3

about: 3

accounting: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report identifies some main features but contains significant inaccuracies in the data reported, which detracts from the task achievement. The numbers provided are significantly lower than the actual figures in the chart. To improve, ensure accurate data representation and pay close attention to the scale of the chart. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report presents a clear overview and identifies key trends. However, the organization could be improved by grouping similar trends together (e.g., increases vs. decreases). Transitions between paragraphs are present but could be more explicit to enhance the flow. Consider using cohesive devices more effectively to link ideas within and between paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

The report uses adequate vocabulary to describe the data. However, there's room to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary to express the trends and comparisons more precisely. For instance, instead of 'increased slightly,' you could use more specific terms like 'experienced a marginal increase' or 'saw a modest rise.' Also, ensure that the vocabulary used accurately reflects the data provided. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a good command of grammar with very few errors. The sentence structures are generally accurate and varied. To further enhance the grammatical range, consider incorporating more complex sentence structures to express relationships between data points more effectively.

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