Bar Chart

Band 6+: The bar chats give information about the salaries and university fees of students from three universities in two spheres-Law and Business.

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Image for topic: The bar chats give information about the salaries and university fees of students from three universities in two spheres-Law and Business.

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The image compares average salaries and university fees of students from three universities in Law and Business, detailing numerical values in thousands of dollars. In Law: University A shows a salary of 35 and a fee of 40; University B displays both salary and fee at 40; University C has a salary of 50 and a fee of 35. In Business: University A indicates a salary of 40 and a fee of 50; University B presents both salary and fee at 50; University C reveals a salary of 55 and a fee of 60.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The given bar charts illustrate the salaries and university fees of students from three different institutions across two fields: Law and Business.

Overall, it is clear that undergraduates earned less than university fees. Also of note is that, the tuition fees and incomes in Law at University B were the highest, while the opposite was true for Business at University A.

To elaborate ,an impressive $60.000 and $ 58.000 were paid for tuition in Law at University B and C, compared to only $40.000$ for University A. Additionally, Law students each earned $40.000 at University A and B, whereas the figure for University C was slightly lower at $38.000.

Regarding business, the tuition fees at University C ranked second with $59.000, followed by university B and A , at $50.000 and $40.000 respectively. At University B and C,graduates had similar incomes of $40.000, while the figure for University A was lowest ,at only $30.000

Word Count: 154

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

university: 12

tuition: 3

$40000: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task and provides an overview, but there are significant inaccuracies in the data reporting that affect the clarity of the comparison. While the structure is logical, the specific figures mentioned in the body paragraphs often contradict the provided visual description (for example, the reported tuition fees and salaries do not align with the values provided in the description). To improve, ensure that the data extracted from the charts is transcribed accurately and that the comparisons between the universities are consistent with the trends shown in the visual information.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure with an introduction, overview, and two body paragraphs. However, there are issues with punctuation and spacing (e.g., 'To elaborate ,an' and 'University B and A , at') that disrupt the flow. Some cohesive devices are used, but the transition between ideas could be smoother. Ensure that commas are placed immediately after a word without a preceding space to maintain professional formatting.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, using terms like 'illustrate', 'undergraduates', and 'respectively'. However, there is some repetition and a lack of sophisticated phrasing. For example, instead of saying 'the figure for... was lowest', you could use 'the lowest income was recorded at...'. Additionally, be careful with the use of currency formatting; ensure consistency in how you present thousands (e.g., using commas instead of periods for thousands is standard in English, such as $60,000).

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical inaccuracies and punctuation errors that hinder the clarity of the report. The use of periods instead of commas in large numbers (e.g., $60.000) is technically incorrect in English-speaking contexts and can be confusing. There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and sentence structure in the overview. To improve, focus on mastering complex sentence structures and ensuring that punctuation (especially commas) is used correctly to separate clauses and items in a list.

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