Bar Chart

Band 6+: The bar short shows the percentages of the UK workforce in five major industries in 1841 and 2011.

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Image for topic: The bar short shows the percentages of the UK workforce in five major industries in 1841 and 2011.

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The image shows a bar chart titled "Percentage of UK workforce in each industry" comparing percentages for the years 1841 and 2011 across five industries. In 1841: Manufacturing 36%, Services 33%, Agriculture 22%, Construction 8%, Energy/Water 1%. In 2011: Manufacturing 9%, Services 81%, Agriculture 1%, Construction 8%, Energy/Water 1%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The chart gives information about the percentages of the British workforce in 1841 and 2011 covering five important income fields. In the past manufacturing industries had the maximum workforce rate, but the sceneraio was changed in 2011 and services industries became the leading one.

In 1841, manufacturing industries had the highest rate of employment with 36% where the least was observed in energy/ water companies with only 3%. Other British workforces including, services, agriculture/ fishing, and construction were noticed with 33%, 22%, and 5% respectively.

By the year of 2011, UK workforce in these sectors had been changed significantly where services showed up with the maximum rate of 81%. About 9% and 8% were found in manufacturing and construction areas accordingly. The least was observed for both agriculture/ fishing and energy/ water with only 1%.

Word Count: 135

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

workforce: 3

manufacturing: 3

industries: 3

services: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main trends and provides relevant data from the bar chart. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g., the percentage for energy/water in 1841). To improve, ensure all data points are accurately represented and consider including comparative language to highlight the significant changes between the two years. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report presents a general overview and some specific data points, but the organization could be improved for better flow. Consider using more cohesive devices to link ideas within and between paragraphs. For example, you could use transition words to show contrast or consequence. Also, ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus and that the information is presented in a logical order.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. Try to use more specific terms related to employment and industry trends. For instance, instead of 'important income fields,' you could use 'major employment sectors.' Also, avoid repetitive phrases like 'the maximum workforce rate' by using synonyms or rephrasing.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains grammatical errors that affect clarity. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and accurate preposition usage. For example, 'the sceneraio was changed' should be 'the scenario changed.' Review and correct these errors to improve the overall grammatical accuracy of your writing.

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