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Band 5+: the chart below show percentage of male and female students of different age groups who studied in Australia for full-time and part-time educaqtion in 2006.

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The image shows two bar charts detailing percentages of male and female students in part-time and full-time education across different age groups in Australia in 2006. For males: age 15-19 had 5% part-time, 40% full-time; age 20-24 had 11% part-time, 15% full-time; age 25-29 had 8% part-time, 5% full-time; age 30+ had 10% part-time, 2% full-time. For females: age 15-19 had 7% part-time, 42% full-time; age 20-24 had 11% part-time, 17% full-time; age 25-29 had 8% part-time, 6% full-time; age 30+ had 12% part-time, 3% full-time.

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The bar charts illustrate the proportion of people and their gender who took either full-time or part-time studies in Australia in 2006. Overall, people mainly preferred part-time studies to full-time ones, although the reverse was true for the oldest age group regardless of their gender. Notably, the majority of students were in 20-24 years cohort.

To begin with the figures for male students, in 2006, there were 12% part-time students compared to 8% full-time ones, whose age was between 15-19. The second group was for male students who were in 20-24 age bracket. This group composed the majority of students, having the biggest percentage for both part-time and full-time studies at 40% and 12% respectively. The figure for 25-29 age demographic was the smallest, for part-time there was only 8%, exceeding full-time ones by two percent point. There was similar percentage (8%) for part-time students in their 30+, while for full-time it composed little higher 10 percent.

For females there were almost similar patterns. The figure for 15-19 aged female who studied part-time was 17%, compared to 7% that of full-time. Meanwhile, the figure for 20-24 year female students studying part-time was outstanding 42% and 13% for full-time. The next age bracket (25-29) both part-time and full-time had similar percentages at 8%. Finally, the oldest age group part-time students’ percentage was as half as full-time ones with 12%.

Word Count: 228

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

full-time: 10

part-time: 10

students: 7

group: 4

there: 4

their: 3

studies: 3

20-24: 3

percentage: 3

figure: 3

similar: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains significant inaccuracies in data reporting that affect the clarity of the summary. There are frequent contradictions between the reported figures and the trends described (for example, stating that the 20-24 age group was the majority with 40%, while the data suggests 40% actually belonged to the 15-19 full-time group). Additionally, some comparisons are mathematically confusing, such as describing a percentage as 'half as full-time' when the numbers provided suggest the opposite. To improve, ensure that data points are accurately mapped to the correct age groups and categories before writing, and double-check that the descriptive language (e.g., 'majority', 'smallest') aligns with the numbers provided.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes hindered by awkward phrasing and unclear referencing. For example, the use of 'whose age was between...' is grammatically clunky and disrupts the flow. To improve, focus on using smoother cohesive devices and ensure that pronouns and relative clauses clearly refer to the intended subjects. The transition between describing males and females is clear, but the internal organization of data within paragraphs could be more streamlined to avoid a repetitive 'list-like' feel.

Lexical Resource

There is an attempt to use a variety of terms to describe age groups (e.g., 'cohort', 'age bracket', 'demographic'), which is positive. However, there are several instances of imprecise word choices and awkward collocations, such as 'the majority of students were in 20-24 years cohort' or 'it composed little higher 10 percent'. Additionally, some phrasing is confusing, such as 'the oldest age group part-time students' percentage was as half as full-time ones', which makes the comparison difficult to follow. Aim for more natural academic expressions and ensure that comparative structures (e.g., 'twice as much as', 'higher than') are used accurately. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede communication. Issues include subject-verb agreement, incorrect preposition usage, and awkward relative clauses (e.g., 'the figure for 15-19 aged female who studied part-time'). There are also errors in how percentages are expressed (e.g., 'two percent point' should be 'two percentage points'). To improve, practice the correct construction of complex sentences and pay close attention to the grammatical rules governing comparisons and noun phrases.

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Band 5+: the chart below show percentage of male and female students of different age groups who studied in Australia for full-time and part-time educaqtion in 2006.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

the chart below show percentage of male and female students of different age groups who studied in Australia for full-time and part-time educaqtion in 2006.

the chart below show percentage of male and female students of different age groups who studied in Australia for full-time and part-time educaqtion in 2006.

the chart below show percentage of male and female students of different age groups who studied in Australia for full-time and part-time educaqtion in 2006.

the chart below show percentage of male and female students of different age groups who studied in Australia for full-time and part-time educaqtion in 2006.

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Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

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Task Response

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Lexical Resource

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