Bar Chart

Band 6+: The chart below shows the percentage of female employees in three job sectors in Greece from 1990 to 2015.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows the percentage of female employees in three job sectors in Greece from 1990 to 2015.

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The image shows a bar graph comparing percentages from 1990 to 2015 across three categories: Call Centre, Banking and Finance, and Customer Service. In 1990, Call Centre is 0%, Banking and Finance is 5%, Customer Service is 10%. In 1995, Call Centre is 5%, Banking and Finance is 10%, Customer Service is 15%. In 2000, Call Centre is 10%, Banking and Finance is 15%, Customer Service is 15%. In 2005, Call Centre is 20%, Banking and Finance is 20%, Customer Service is 25%. In 2010, Call Centre is 30%, Banking and Finance is 25%, Customer Service is 30%. In 2015, Call Centre is 45%, Banking and Finance is 35%, Customer Service is 50%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The chart below illustrates the proportion of female employees in three job sectors in Greece from 1990 to 2015.

Overall, the number of female workers was increasing steadily. Two of the job sectors had a significant rise in numbers. However, the banking and finance job sector was fluctuating.

There is a huge difference between the number of women employees in 1990 and 2015. In 1990, there were 12% of females working in customer servive, however in 2015 there was 50%. Moreover, the number of employees in the call centre stayed nearly the same in 1990 and 1995, reaching 3% then started fluctuating. The number of workers in the banking and finance had a noticeable rise in 2015 and reached 35%.

Throughout the period, the numbers of workers in the call centre started increasing between 2000 and 2015. Nonetheless, It reached 45% in 2015 and took the second place after being the third in the previous years.

Word Count: 156

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

number: 4

employees: 3

workers: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main trends and provides some specific data points, but there are some inaccuracies and omissions. For example, the report states that in 1990, there were 12% of females working in customer service (the graph shows 10%). Also, the report states that the number of employees in the call centre stayed nearly the same in 1990 and 1995, reaching 3% (the graph shows 0% and 5% respectively). To improve, ensure data accuracy and provide a more comprehensive overview, including all three sectors in each paragraph.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report presents a general overview and attempts to highlight key trends, but the organization could be improved. The paragraphs lack clear topic sentences, and the transitions between ideas are sometimes abrupt. For instance, the shift from the overall trend to specific data points in the second paragraph feels disjointed. Consider using more cohesive devices to link ideas and ensure a smoother flow.

Lexical Resource

The report uses adequate vocabulary to describe the trends and data, but there's room for more precise and varied language. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'number of employees,' you could use synonyms like 'proportion,' 'percentage,' or 'representation.' Also, try to incorporate more specific vocabulary related to trends, such as 'plateaued,' 'peaked,' or 'experienced a surge.' Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors and inaccuracies that affect clarity. For example, 'customer servive' should be 'customer service,' and there are issues with verb tense and subject-verb agreement. While the overall meaning is understandable, these errors detract from the report's credibility. Focus on proofreading carefully and reviewing basic grammar rules to improve accuracy.

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