Bar Chart

Band 6+: The chart below shows the results of three surveys on absenteeism in a particular European country in the years of 2000, 2005 and 2010.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows the results of three surveys on absenteeism in a particular European country in the years of 2000, 2005 and 2010.

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The image shows a bar graph with five categories: illness, stress, person needs (appointments, etc.), family responsibilities, and unexpected problems (transport, weather, etc.) over three years, 2000, 2005, and 2010. For illness, the percentages are 40% (2000), 38% (2005), and 35% (2010); for stress, the figures are approximately 5% (2000), 15% (2005), and 10% (2010); for person needs, it is 10% (2000), 12% (2005), and 10% (2010); for family responsibilities, the data points are 18% (2000), 25% (2005), and 30% (2010); lastly, for unexpected problems, the values are about 8% (2000), 5% (2005), and 12% (2010).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The bar chart illustrates the results of three different surveys on absenteeism among European nations from 2000 to 2010.

Overall, illness was the most popular reason why workers were not going to work, whereas stress was the least popular reason. While illness and family responsibilities’s figures decreased, stress, personal needs and unexpected problems rose.

In 2000, illness topped the list, accounting at 45%, this figure was nearly as twice as the second. This was followed by family responsibilities, contributing for roughly 30%, making it the second popular reason for being absent among workers. Personal needs and unexpected problems came next, accounting for 15% and 10%, respectively. Stress made up the smallest proportion, witnessing just approximately 6%.

From 2005 to 2010, the illness’ figure experienced a moderate decrease to 40% in 2005, continuing falling to 35% in 2010, but illness was the main reason why people were not going to work. Family responsibilities also showed a downward trend, slightly declining to roughly 23% and remained stable. In contrast, personal needs, unexpected problems and stress observed upward trends. Stress slightly fell to 6% in 2005 before rising sharply to 14% in 2010. Personal needs’ figure climbed significantly to roughly 22% and declined moderately to 20% afterwards. Unexpected problems increased dramatically to 15% and remained stable until 2010.

Word Count: 215

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

stress: 5

illness: 4

reason: 4

personal: 4

unexpected: 4

problems: 4

popular: 3

family: 3

needs: 3

figure: 3

roughly: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main trends and provides relevant data from the bar chart. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported, and the description of trends could be more precise. To improve, ensure all data cited is accurate and proofread carefully. Also, focus on highlighting the most significant changes and overall trends rather than describing every single fluctuation.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate level of coherence and cohesion, but there are areas where improvements can be made. The overall structure is clear, with an introduction, overview, and detailed paragraphs for each time period. However, the transitions between sentences and ideas could be smoother. For instance, in the second paragraph, the contrast between the trends of different reasons for absenteeism could be highlighted more explicitly. In the third paragraph, the connection between the initial statement about 2000 and the subsequent details could be strengthened with better linking words or phrases. Also, paragraphing could be improved by grouping information more thematically rather than strictly chronologically. For example, discussing all reasons that increased together, and those that decreased together, might enhance coherence.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a satisfactory range of vocabulary, but there are instances where more precise or varied language could be used. The vocabulary is generally appropriate for the task, but there is some repetition of words and phrases (e.g., 'figure,' 'popular reason'). To enhance lexical resource, consider using synonyms or more specific terms to describe trends and proportions. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'figure,' you could use 'percentage,' 'proportion,' or 'rate.' Additionally, incorporating a wider range of adjectives and adverbs to describe the changes (e.g., 'significant,' 'gradual,' 'steady') would improve the sophistication of the language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a reasonable command of grammar, but there are several errors that affect clarity and accuracy. Subject-verb agreement errors are present (e.g., 'family responsibilities's figures decreased'). There are also issues with article usage (e.g., 'accounting at 45%'). Sentence structure is generally correct, but some sentences are awkward or unclear due to incorrect word order or phrasing (e.g., 'This was followed by family responsibilities, contributing for roughly 30%'). To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on proofreading carefully for common errors, particularly subject-verb agreement, article usage, and preposition choice. Additionally, practice using a variety of sentence structures to enhance the complexity and sophistication of your writing.

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