Pie Chart

Band 5+: The charts below show the qualifications of staff in an advertising company in 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The charts below show the qualifications of staff in an advertising company in 1990 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image contains 2 pie charts displaying data for 1990 and 2010. For 1990, Ph.D. Science is at 29%, Master-Science is at 21%, First Degree-Science is at 20%, First Degree-Art is at 15%, Ph.D.-Art is at 2%, and Master-Art is at 13%. For 2010, the data shows Ph.D. Science at 30%, Master-Science at 21%, Master-Art at 23%, First Degree-Science at 11%, First Degree-Art at 2%, and Ph.D.-Art at 5%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The number of people who are qualified in an advertising industry has been illustrated by the pie chart in a period of 2 decades.

It can be seen that, overall, phd science, master art, and pjd art experienced increases while the opposite was the case for first degree art, first degree science and Master Science leveled off.In addition, phd science was the highest at the end whereas the reverse was true for the first degree art.

When it comes to the educational backgrounds of employees in an advertising business in 1990, Master science at the first position with a figure of 29%,followed by Master Art as well as first degree science at 21% and 20% respectively. In contrast, first degree art belonged to the lowest position which Was followed by phd science at 15%and 12% sequentially. PhD Art at the tiny portion at 2%.

In terms of qualifications of employees in an advertising company in 2010, phd science had the highest proportion at 30%and muster science was also quite similar with a 29%. First degree art, phd art as well as first degree science all fell rang in the 2% to11%. Master degree art had the lowest position 23% respectively.

Word Count: 200

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

science: 10

first: 8

degree: 8

master: 5

advertising: 3

position: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task but contains some inaccuracies and omissions. The organization is present but could be improved for clarity. The data reporting contains some errors. For example, in 1990, Ph.D. Science is at 29%, not Master Science. Also, Master Science is at 21%, not 29%. Proofread the report to eliminate these errors. Also, the last sentence is not clear. Try to rephrase it.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an attempt to organize the information, but the flow is disrupted by a lack of clear transitions and some illogical sequencing of ideas. Paragraphing could be improved to better group related information. For example, the overview could be more concise and focused, and the body paragraphs could be structured to compare specific categories or trends more effectively. Using cohesive devices more strategically would also enhance the overall readability.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a limited range of vocabulary, and there are instances of imprecise word choice. To improve, try to incorporate more varied and specific vocabulary related to describing data and trends. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'number of people' or 'highest proportion,' explore synonyms and more descriptive phrases. Also, ensure that the vocabulary used is appropriate for academic writing.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. These errors significantly impact the clarity and accuracy of the report. Focus on improving your understanding and application of basic grammar rules. Review sentence structure and practice writing clear, concise sentences. Proofreading carefully for errors before submitting your work is essential.

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