Process Diagram

Band 6+: The diagram below illustrates the main stages of soap production in the past and present. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

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Image for topic: The diagram below illustrates the main stages of soap production in the past and present. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

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The image details two soap production processes. Method from '1,000 years ago': stored animal fat is combined with added plant ashes, then mixed and heated. The 'nowadays' method: begins with 'splitting', where molten fat and water at 130°C yield fatty acid and glycerin; followed by 'mixing' the fatty acid with alkali; then 'cooling' the mixture in a mould; proceeding to 'milling', where perfume is added and the substance passes through rollers; and concluding with 'finishing', which involves stamping and wrapping.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The given diagrams compare the methods to produce soap in the past and present time. Overall, there were only three steps to manufacture a soap while nowadays it require five steps to produce it. The key difference is the use of machinery and lengthy process.

In 1000 years ago, firstly animal fats were stored and preserved over the time, after which plant ashes were added. With this, it was mixed and heated in a pot to produce soaps.

However, in present time fats are molted to extract fatty acid and glycerin by boing it at 130 degrees. After splitting process, fatty acid is mixed with alkali and moulted in shaping containers to let it cool. It is then rolled over with adding perfume at the same time before stamping and wrapping it as a finishing process.

Word Count: 136

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

produce: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main stages of soap production in both the past and present, highlighting key differences like the use of machinery and the number of steps involved. The description of each process is generally clear and easy to follow. To improve, consider adding more specific details and comparisons to enhance the analysis and provide a more comprehensive overview. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report provides a general overview of the soap production processes, but the organization could be improved. The 'Overall' statement is a good start, but the subsequent paragraphs could benefit from clearer topic sentences and transitions to guide the reader. Consider using more specific language to highlight the key differences and similarities between the past and present methods. For example, you could group similar stages or contrast specific steps more directly.

Lexical Resource

The report uses adequate vocabulary to describe the processes, but there's room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. For instance, instead of repeatedly using 'steps,' try incorporating synonyms like 'stages,' 'phases,' or 'processes.' Also, consider using more specific verbs to describe the actions involved in each stage. For example, instead of 'mixed and heated,' you could use 'combined and heated' or 'blended and heated.' This would enhance the clarity and sophistication of your writing.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors and phrasing issues that affect clarity. For example, 'molted' should be 'melted,' and 'boing it at 130 degrees' should be 'boiling it at 130 degrees.' Additionally, the sentence structure could be improved in several places to enhance readability. For instance, consider rephrasing sentences like 'It is then rolled over with adding perfume at the same time before stamping and wrapping it as a finishing process' to something like 'Perfume is added during the milling process, where the mixture is rolled before being stamped and wrapped as a final step.' Proofreading carefully for errors and varying sentence structure will improve the grammatical accuracy and overall quality of your writing.

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