Line Graph

Band 4+: The given line graph demonstrates information about the number of employee worked as labour in the United States in a over eighty-year period between 1930 and 2010.

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Image for topic: The given line graph demonstrates information about the number of employee worked as labour in the United States in a over eighty-year period between 1930 and 2010.

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The image displays a line graph titled "USA labour force employment 1930-2010", with data points for five employment sectors. For Farming, fishing and Foresting, the percentages are: 1930: 75%, 1940: ~73%, 1950: ~70%, 1960: ~68%, 1970: 60%, 1980: 40%, 1990: 20%, 2000: 5%, 2010: <1%. For Industrial, the percentages are: 1930: ~2%, 1940: ~5%, 1950: ~8%, 1960: ~15%, 1970: ~22%, 1980: ~30%, 1990: ~35%, 2000: ~37%, 2010: ~36%. For Sales and Office, the percentages are: 1930: ~2%, 1940: ~5%, 1950: ~6%, 1960: ~5%, 1970: ~7%, 1980: ~12%, 1990: ~19%, 2000: ~22%, 2010: 25%. For Other Services, the percentages are: 1930: 8%, 1940: 13%, 1950: 7%, 1960: 10%, 1970: 8%, 1980: 10%, 1990: 13%, 2000: 19%, 2010: 19%. For Technical, the percentages are: 1930: 0%, 1940: ~1%, 1950: ~4%, 1960: ~6%, 1970: ~8%, 1980: ~10%, 1990: ~11%, 2000: ~12%, 2010: ~12%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Overall, people worked as farmers, fisher, and work in forest decreased rapidly, while other sectors had a slight fall or climb.

Focus on primary industry sector, it started as the majority type of job people chose in 1930 with 75 labours. However, it dropped minorly from 1930 to 1970 and recorded a slump in the following 40 years between 1970 and 2010. It finally approached approximately zero.

Conversely, other aspects illustrated relative stable. People worked with technology began with nearly zero and then rose slightly to 25 employees. No citizen worked in industry at first, there was a sharp increase in a eighty-year period between 1930 and 2010. Moreover, employment of sales and office started with around 10 residents, it fell at 1930s but climbed minorly at the following 70 years. Similarly, other services started with the same number of employees. Nevertheless, it fluctuated slightly and didn’t have an obvious change finally.

Word Count: 152

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 3

worked: 3

other: 3

started: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task and covers the main trends, but there are significant issues with data accuracy and clarity. The report frequently confuses the units of measurement, referring to percentages as 'labours', 'employees', or 'residents', which misrepresents the data. Additionally, some specific data points are inaccurate (e.g., stating technical work rose to 25 employees when the data suggests a much lower percentage, or misidentifying the starting point for sales and office). To improve, ensure you clearly distinguish between absolute numbers and percentages, and focus on grouping the data more logically to highlight comparisons between the sectors.

Coherence & Cohesion

The organization of ideas is somewhat logical, but the progression is hindered by poor sentence structure and weak cohesive devices. The use of 'Conversely' and 'Moreover' is present, but the transitions between sentences often feel abrupt or grammatically incorrect (e.g., 'Focus on primary industry sector...'). To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and use a wider variety of linking words to connect ideas smoothly. Avoid starting sentences with fragments; instead, use full clauses to guide the reader through the comparisons.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is limited and often used inaccurately, which can lead to confusion. For example, using '75 labours' or '25 employees' to describe percentages is a significant lexical error, as the data refers to proportions, not raw numbers. Terms like 'minorly' are non-standard; 'slightly' or 'marginally' would be better. There is also a lack of precision in describing trends (e.g., 'other aspects illustrated relative stable'). Aim to learn specific collocations for describing trends, such as 'experienced a significant decline' or 'remained relatively stable,' and ensure you distinguish between counts and percentages.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and significantly impact the clarity of the report. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'people worked... decreased'), incorrect word forms (e.g., 'relative stable' instead of 'relatively stable'), and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'No citizen worked in industry at first, there was a sharp increase...'). There are also issues with preposition usage and sentence boundaries (comma splices). To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures, particularly how to use adjectives and adverbs correctly, and practice using complex sentences with subordinating conjunctions (e.g., 'While the primary sector declined, the industrial sector saw a rise').

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