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Band 5+: The graph and table below give information about percentage of graduates in Australia who worked full-time after university from 2004 to 2012.

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Image for topic: The graph and table below give information about percentage of graduates in Australia who worked full-time after university from 2004 to 2012.

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The image contains a graph and table; the graph shows the percentage of full-time workers holding a university degree from 2004 to 2012. In 2004, all graduates had 75%, while mathematics graduates had 74%. Both reached their peak in 2008, with all graduates at 89% and mathematics graduates at 88%. By 2012, percentages were at 77% for all graduates and 64% for mathematics graduates. The table shows average salaries for 2004-2012: Maths graduates earned $41,000 in 2004, $43,500 in 2006, $51,500 in 2008, $48,500 in 2010, and $59,000 in 2012; Other graduates earned $41,000 in 2004, $43,500 in 2006, $48,000 in 2008, $52,000 in 2010, and $53,000 in 2012.

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The line graph a provides the proportion of Australian graduates under two categories : all graduates and mathematics graduates doing full time job, while the table shows the average income received by the working graduants between 2004 and 2012.

Overal, the degree holders who took part in the full time job fluctuates throughout the period.Whereas, the average amount of money received by the this workers rose as the years pass by.

As illustrated from the charts, the proportions of all degree holders faced a slight increase from 80% to around 85% in 2004 and 2008 before it faced decline to just above three quarters in 2012.However, mathematics graduates went up from about 65% in 2004 to almost 90% in 2006.Intrestingly,it’s percentage declined in the following years upto approximately 65%in 2012.

In regards to the amount received by this group of employees, it remained similar for both categories in 2004 and 2006 with $41,000 and $43,500 respectively.In the subsequent years, there were slight variations in both groups of graduates ranging from $48,000 and $59,000.

Word Count: 173

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

graduates: 5

received: 3

years: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main requirements of the task and provides an overview of the trends. However, there are several inaccuracies in the data reporting that affect the clarity of the response. For instance, the starting percentage for all graduates is reported as 80-85% when the data suggests 75%, and the mathematics graduate trend is described with incorrect years and figures. To improve, ensure that the data points extracted from the visual aids are precise and that the relationship between the figures is described accurately. Additionally, work on grammatical accuracy and spelling (e.g., 'graduants', 'intrestingly', 'overal') to ensure a smoother flow of information.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs. However, there are several issues with cohesive devices. Some sentences start with 'Whereas' or 'However' in a way that creates fragments or awkward transitions. For example, 'Whereas, the average amount...' is not a complete sentence. To improve, ensure that subordinating conjunctions are used to connect clauses within a single sentence rather than starting a new sentence with them. Additionally, ensure there is consistent spacing after punctuation marks to improve readability.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main ideas, but there are several spelling and word choice errors. For instance, 'graduants' should be 'graduates', 'intrestingly' should be 'interestingly', and 'upto' should be two words 'up to'. There is also some repetitive phrasing regarding 'amount of money received'. To reach a higher band, try to use a wider variety of synonyms for 'increase' (e.g., rose, climbed, surged) and 'decrease' (e.g., fell, dropped, declined), and ensure all technical terms are spelled correctly.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report attempts a mix of simple and complex structures, but grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'the degree holders... fluctuates' should be 'fluctuated') and article usage (e.g., 'the this workers'). Tense consistency is also an issue; since the data refers to a completed period in the past (2004-2012), the past tense should be used consistently throughout the report. Focus on mastering basic sentence structures and ensuring that verb tenses align with the time period being described.

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Band 5+: The graph and table below give information about percentage of graduates in Australia who worked full-time after university from 2004 to 2012.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The graph and table below give information about percentage of graduates in Australia who worked full-time after university from 2004 to 2012.

The graph and table below give information about percentage of graduates in Australia who worked full-time after university from 2004 to 2012.

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