Bar Chart

Band 5+: The graph below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time.

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The image shows "Computer ownership by education level, 2002 and 2010" with percentages as follows: No high school diploma 2002: 15%, 2010: 40%; High school graduate 2002: 40%, 2010: 65%; College (incomplete) 2002: 55%, 2010: 75%; Bachelor's degree 2002: 70%, 2010: 85%; Postgraduate qualification 2002: 80%, 2010: 95%.

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This bar chart indicates the number of men and women in further education in Britain in periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time. The five level education are mentioned which is no high school diploma, high school diploma, college which shows incomplete, bechelor’s degree and the last one post qualification.

Firstly, this bar chart goes upwarding trend from 2002 to 2010. The maximum educational level percentage in postgraduate qualification is almost above 70 to 95 approximate in 2002 and 2010 which is kind of huge, but in the other hand no high school diploma has the lowest percentage which is 15 percent in 2002 and 42 percent in 2010 though there have slightly diffrences between 42 to 15 percent.

In the other level of education has increased from 2002 to 2010. From high school to bachelor’s degree in 2002 the percentage increasd from 35 to close 70 percent gradually which is quite impresive . In the same scenario the level in 2010 also goes upward from approsimate 40 to almost 90 percent.

End up the scenario the number of men and women in further education in Britain is quite upgrading day by day

Word Count: 195

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

which: 5

education: 4

level: 4

school: 4

diploma: 3

percentage: 3

percent: 3

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Task Response

The response only attempts to address the task. Key points may be irrelevant, repetitive, inaccurate or inappropriate. The description of the data is not always clear, and the organization could be improved. To improve, focus on accurately describing the key trends and figures in the graph, and organize the information in a more logical and coherent manner.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report's organization is somewhat unclear, and the flow of information could be improved. The introduction mentions a bar chart about men and women in education, but the data presented is about computer ownership. This discrepancy creates confusion. The paragraphs lack clear topic sentences, and the transitions between them are weak. To improve coherence, ensure the introduction accurately reflects the content of the report, use topic sentences to guide the reader, and employ transition words to connect ideas smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks precision. There are instances of imprecise word choice (e.g., "upwarding trend," "kind of huge," "slightly diffrences," "impresive," "approsimate"). To enhance lexical resource, try to use more specific and varied vocabulary related to trends, comparisons, and data analysis. For example, instead of "upwarding trend," use "increasing trend" or "growth." Instead of "kind of huge," use "significant" or "substantial."

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. These include incorrect verb forms ("goes upwarding"), incorrect articles ("the five level education"), and awkward phrasing. Sentence structure is also quite simple, limiting the expression of more complex relationships between data points. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on using a variety of sentence structures (e.g., complex sentences with subordinate clauses) and carefully proofread for errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, and article usage.

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