Bar Chart

Band 5+: The graph below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time.

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The image shows "Computer ownership by education level, 2002 and 2010" with percentages as follows: No high school diploma 2002: 15%, 2010: 40%; High school graduate 2002: 40%, 2010: 65%; College (incomplete) 2002: 55%, 2010: 75%; Bachelor's degree 2002: 70%, 2010: 85%; Postgraduate qualification 2002: 80%, 2010: 95%.

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The bar chart illustrate data about the five different educational degree who owned a computer in 2002 and 2010.

Overall, the proportion of computer ownership in each educational level in 2010 was higher than in 2002. Moreover, by the higher educational degree, more students would have owned a computer.

In 2002, only 15% people with no high school diploma degree who had a computer, making it as the fewest ownership. People who had graduated from high school, the ownership rate was about 35%. When the high school graduate had joined a university, almost 55% of them had owned a computer. In bachelor’s degree, around 70% of the students had an ownership in computer. Lastly, nearly 75% people of postgraduate qualification having a computer ownership.

In 2010, the proportion of computer ownership in no high school diploma and high school graduate were categorized as the lower ownership, representing about 45% and 65%, respectively. While in the figures of uncompleted collage students, bachelor’s degree and postgraduate qualification were categorized as the higher ownership in computer, accounted for 85%, 90%, and nearly 100%, respectively.

Word Count: 181

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

computer: 8

ownership: 7

degree: 5

school: 5

about: 3

educational: 3

owned: 3

higher: 3

students: 3

people: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task by identifying the main trends and providing a clear comparison between the two years and the different education levels. The overview is well-constructed, highlighting the general increase in ownership and the correlation between education level and computer access. To improve, ensure more precise data grouping and avoid minor grammatical inconsistencies when describing percentages. The response covers all key requirements of the task sufficiently.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure with an introduction, overview, and two body paragraphs organized by year. However, the progression is sometimes hindered by awkward phrasing and grammatical errors that force the reader to pause and re-read to grasp the intended meaning. To improve, focus on using more effective cohesive devices and ensuring that sentences flow naturally into one another. Avoid repetitive sentence structures like 'In [year], [data]...'

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is somewhat limited and often used incorrectly, which impacts clarity. For example, phrases like 'five different educational degree' and 'had an ownership in computer' are unnatural. There is also some confusion in word choice, such as using 'categorized' when 'recorded' or 'observed' would be more appropriate. Aim to learn more precise collocations related to data description, such as 'ownership rates,' 'the proportion of,' and 'levels of education.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and occur in almost every sentence. There are significant issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'chart illustrate'), sentence fragments (e.g., 'Lastly, nearly 75% people... having a computer ownership'), and incorrect preposition usage. While you attempt to use complex structures, they often result in errors that obscure the message. Focus on mastering basic sentence structures and ensuring that every sentence has a clear subject, verb, and object before attempting more complex grammatical forms.

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