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Band 6+: The line chart below shows the percentage of people in different age groups who played video games more than ten hours a week between 2010 and 2015

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Image for topic: The line chart below shows the percentage of people in different age groups who played video games more than ten hours a week between 2010 and 2015

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The image contains a line graph with a y-axis from 0 to 80 and an x-axis showing years 2010, 2011, 2012, 2013, 2014, and 2015, tracking five age groups. For the 16-24 age group, the values for 2010 to 2015 are approximately 42, 55, 58, 60, 63, and 70. The 25-44 age group values are 40, 32, 30, 32, 40, and 48. The 45-54 age group values are approximately 52, 40, 50, 52, 52, and 53. The 55-64 age group values are approximately 25, 30, 30, 29, 25, and 23. For the 75+ age group, the values are approximately 10, 22, 12, 10, 13, and 21.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The line chart illustrates the proportion of people in five age categories who spent more than ten hours a week by playing video games, from 2010 to 2015.

Overall, people from the age of 75 and older have the lowest rate. The percentage is varying between 10 and 20%. Although, the group of people from 55 to 64 maintains almost the same level, approximately a quarter. The percentage rised to 30% in 2011 and till the 2013, but then went to the same rate as it was at the begining. The category with age of 45-54 had the highest rate amoung others in 2010, accounting for a half. It was stable, but only in 2011, the amount of people who played video games declined. The youngest grop, from 16 to 24, in 2010 had identical rate, but the popularity of playing video games started to surge so, thus in 2015, the percentage reached the highest point of 70%.

In conclusion, the young people are more intrested in playing video games nowadays, while elder people are not.

Word Count: 176

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 6

video: 4

games: 4

playing: 3

percentage: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main trends and features of the line chart, providing a general overview of the data. However, there are some areas for improvement. The description of the 55-64 age group could be more precise, and the report could benefit from more specific data points to support the observations. Additionally, the conclusion is quite general and could be strengthened by referencing specific trends or age groups. Overall, the report demonstrates a good understanding of the task but could be enhanced with more detail and precision.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize the information, but there are some noticeable lapses in coherence and cohesion. The flow of ideas could be improved with better use of cohesive devices and transitional phrases. Paragraphing is acceptable but could be more skillfully managed to enhance clarity. For example, the second paragraph contains multiple ideas that could be separated for better readability.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a reasonable range of vocabulary, but there are instances where the word choice is not precise or natural. Expanding the vocabulary and using more sophisticated lexical items would enhance the quality of the report. For example, 'identical rate' could be rephrased for better impact. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a fair range of grammatical structures, but there are several grammatical errors and inaccuracies that affect clarity. Correcting these errors and improving grammatical control would significantly improve the report. For example, 'The percentage rised' should be 'The percentage rose,' and 'amount of people who played video games declined' could be rephrased for better grammatical accuracy.

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