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Band 5+: The map below shows the development of the museum between 2010 and 2013

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Image for topic: The map below shows the development of the museum between 2010 and 2013

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The image displays two museum layouts for 2010 and 2013. In 2010, the museum comprised an Entrance, Lobby, Ticket desk, Dinosaurs hall, Mammals hall, Ocean Hall, and a Garden containing 4 trees. By 2013, the layout featured the same Entrance, Lobby, Ticket desk, Dinosaurs hall, and Ocean Hall; the previous Mammals hall was replaced by two new halls, Ice age and Insects, while the Garden area was repurposed to include a Shop, a Cafe, a relocated Mammals hall, and a Human Origins Display within the Mammals hall.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The devlopment of the museum between 2010 and 2013 has many changes in just 3 years.

At first in 2010 it has only 4 main sections which include Lobby, Dinosaurs Zone, Mammals Zone and Ocean hall which visitors can see this zone first after they walked past the lobby.

Furthermore, in 2010 the museum still has a garden outside however in 2013 its decided to extend the museum for having more spaces. For this purpose, they cut all the trees and build new zones which are Ice age zone, Insects zone, human origins display, shop and cafe. And the relevant changes are switching Mammals zone to the new spaces and replace Mamamals zone to be Ice age zone instead. Within Ice age zone it has a small section display which is Insect zone. Right now, on the right new spaces zone are consists of Mammals zone, Human Origin Display zone, shop and lastly cafe for visitors. You will be find all the intertesting of the another century of our world here.

Word Count: 171

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

which: 4

museum: 3

mammals: 3

spaces: 3

display: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report identifies some key changes between the two maps but lacks detail and accuracy in describing the specific alterations. The organization is somewhat clear, but the language is basic and contains errors. To improve, focus on providing more specific details about the changes, using more precise language, and ensuring grammatical accuracy.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates some attempt at organization, but the flow of information is often disjointed. The introduction is very basic. The body paragraphs lack clear topic sentences, making it difficult to follow the main points. Transitions between ideas are weak or absent, leading to a lack of coherence. For example, the shift from describing the 2010 layout to the 2013 changes feels abrupt. Paragraphing could be improved by grouping related information together more logically. To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on using clear topic sentences, logical transitions, and well-defined paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is quite basic and repetitive, which limits the precision and sophistication of the description. There is a reliance on simple words and phrases. The report would benefit from a wider range of vocabulary to describe the changes and features of the museum more effectively. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'zone' or 'spaces,' try to use more descriptive terms like 'exhibit,' 'area,' or 'hall.' To enhance lexical resource, try to incorporate synonyms and more specific vocabulary related to museum layouts and exhibits. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors that impede understanding. There are issues with sentence structure, verb tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and article usage. For example, the sentence 'The devlopment of the museum between 2010 and 2013 has many changes in just 3 years' contains a misspelling and awkward phrasing. The report needs significant improvement in grammatical accuracy to effectively convey the information. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on reviewing basic grammar rules, proofreading carefully for errors, and practicing writing with a variety of sentence structures.

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