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Band 5+: The past school plan and the future one to accommodate more students and add more buildings, car park and a road.

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Image for topic: The past school plan and the future one to accommodate more students and add more buildings, car park and a road.

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The image depicts diagrams comparing school sites for 2004 and 2024; in 2004 there are 600 students, and in 2024, 1,000 students; in 2004 there is a car park 1 to the west, school building 1 to the northwest near the entrance, school building 2 to the south connected by a path to building 1, and a sports field to the northeast; in 2024 there is an additional car park 2 to the east, a new road leading from the northwest entrance to the southeast, additional school building 3 to the north side of school building 2, a relocated sports field to the southeast, and a path connecting school buildings 1, 2, and 3.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The two pictures below show a maps of school sites in the past which in 2004 and in the future in 2024.

Ovarall, the big changes in the future is the sports field that became smaller. Therefore, there will be one additional car park and school building. The additional school building which is third school building will be built in the sport field and next to the third school building will be the second car park. In the other hand, The school building one and two had a hall that are combine the building. From the main antrance, next to the second school building, between the third school building and the sports field there will be a road that goes to the second park car.

Beside the changes in the building, the school has more student in the future. It will have 400 additional student in the future, from 600 to 1000 student.

Word Count: 153

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

school: 9

building: 9

future: 4

field: 3

additional: 3

third: 3

second: 3

student: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report identifies some key changes between the two maps but lacks detail and accuracy in describing the specific locations and relationships of the new and modified features. The overview is very general and doesn't highlight the most significant changes. To improve, focus on providing more precise descriptions of the changes, using specific directional language and referencing the original locations of features. Also, ensure the overview captures the most important overall trends.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and paragraphing. The information is not presented in a logical order, making it difficult to follow the changes between the two maps. Consider grouping information by area (e.g., buildings, sports field, car park) and using clear transition words to guide the reader. The 'Ovarall' section is not well-integrated and feels disjointed.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. There are instances of imprecise word choice (e.g., 'combine the building,' 'main antrance'). Try to use a wider range of vocabulary to describe the changes and locations more accurately. For example, instead of 'next to,' use more specific terms like 'adjacent to,' 'adjoining,' or 'in close proximity to.' Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and incorrect article usage. Sentence structure is often awkward and unclear. For example, 'The school building one and two had a hall that are combine the building' is grammatically incorrect and difficult to understand. Focus on improving your understanding of basic grammar rules and sentence construction.

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