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Band 5+: The table below describes the proportion of smokers in males and females (between the age of 15 and 20) in Britain. v.2

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The image provides a table showing the proportion of smokers among males and females aged 15 to 20 in Britain from 1970 to 2000 at 5-year intervals. For males: 1970-10%, 1975-22%, 1980-35%, 1985-37%, 1990-36%, 1995-30%, 2000-28%. For females: 1970-5%, 1975-13%, 1980-22%, 1985-34%, 1990-37%, 1995-32%, 2000-27%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The table illustrates the number of smokers in males and females between the age of 15 and 20 and how it changed from 1970 to 2000 in Britain.

Overall, it is evident that males are the leaders of consuming cigarettes. Furthermore, women and men have the close results in 1990, it is declined with only 1 per cent in males results.

Looking closely at the results of men they were rapidly growing in 1970 until 1985 from 10 per cent to 37. While women gain only 34% over this period, starting with 5%. In 1990 the number of smokers in Britain stabilised with a little difference in 1%. After two years both females and males had received a new decline in 2000, namely: males – 28 per cent, females – 27 per cent.

In conclusion, females and males had a little differences, but then stabilised and the number of smokers were grown from 1970 to 2000.

Word Count: 156

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

males: 6

females: 4

number: 3

smokers: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the requirements of the task, providing a general overview of the data and highlighting key trends. However, there are some omissions and lapses in detail. To improve, consider including more specific data points and comparisons to support your observations. Also, ensure that the language used is precise and avoids generalizations.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an attempt to organize the information, but the flow is disrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. The overall structure is present, with an introduction, overview, body paragraphs, and conclusion, but the connections between ideas need improvement. For example, the transition between the overview and the detailed analysis could be smoother. Consider using more cohesive devices to link sentences and paragraphs logically.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate for the task, but there's room for improvement in terms of variety and precision. Some phrases are a bit repetitive or could be expressed more concisely. For instance, instead of saying 'the leaders of consuming cigarettes,' you could use a more specific term like 'higher smoking rates.' Expanding your range of vocabulary and focusing on precise word choice will enhance the clarity and impact of your writing. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity and readability. Common issues include incorrect verb tenses ('are the leaders' instead of 'were'), subject-verb agreement problems, and awkward sentence structures. For example, the sentence 'While women gain only 34% over this period, starting with 5%' is grammatically incorrect. Focus on improving your understanding and application of basic grammar rules, and consider proofreading carefully to catch errors before submitting your work.

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Band 5+: The table below describes the proportion of smokers in males and females (between the age of 15 and 20) in Britain. v.2

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The table below describes the proportion of smokers in males and females (between the age of 15 and 20) in Britain. v.2

The table below describes the proportion of smokers in males and females (between the age of 15 and 20) in Britain. v.2

The table below describes the proportion of smokers in males and females (between the age of 15 and 20) in Britain. v.2

The table below describes the proportion of smokers in males and females (between the age of 15 and 20) in Britain. v.2

Other Topics:

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The table below gives information about values of the exports of kiwi fruit from New Zealand to five countries between 2010 and 2012. (Unit: NZ$)

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Coherence & Cohesion

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