Table

Band 7+: the table below shows th worldwide market share of the notebook computer market for manufacturers in the years 2006, 2007 and 2014 summarise the information and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

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Image for topic: the table below shows th worldwide market share of the notebook computer market for manufacturers in the years 2006, 2007 and 2014 summarise the information and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

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The image contains a table detailing worldwide market share for notebook computer manufacturers. For 2006, 2007, and 2014 respectively, the percentages were: HP with 31.4%, 34%, and 34.25%; Dell with 16.6%, 20.2%, and 26.12%; Samsung with 11.6%, 10.7%, and 14.20%; Toshiba with 6.2%, 7.3%, and 8.12%; Lenovo with 6.6%, 6.2%, and 7.10%; Fujitsu with 4.8%, 2.3%, and 3.1%; and Others with 22.8%, 19.3%, and 7.11%. The total market share for each of the three years was 100%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The table provides information about the share percentages of notebook computer companies in the years 2006, 2007 and 2014.

Overall, HP accounted for the highest percentages, while Fujitsu made up the least percenages over three different periods of time.

A more detailed examination shows that HP began with the largest proportion, 31.4% in 2006, then increased the share percentage to 34% in 2007, thereafter increased marginally to 34.25%. The percentages of the companies; Dell and Toshiba began at 16.6% and 6,2% respectively in 2006. The figures for both of these companies experienced increase to 20.2% and 7.3% respectively in 2007. These patterns rose further in 2014 to 26.12% and 8.12% in the same order.

The figures for Samsung, Lenova and Fujitsu fluctuated over the given period. Samsung accounted for 11.6% in 2006, then decreased to 10.7% in 2007, before experiencing the increase to 14.20% in 2007. The figures for Lenova and other companies accounted for the relatively the same proportion around 7.10% in 2014. The figures for Lenova sales remained largely unchanged around 6% in both 2006 and 2007.

Word Count: 179

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

figures: 4

percentages: 3

companies: 3

accounted: 3

lenova: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report adequately covers the requirements of the task, presenting the main trends and making relevant comparisons. However, there are some minor inaccuracies and omissions. To improve, ensure all data points are accurately represented and consider a more structured approach to grouping the information.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally well-organized, with a clear introduction and overview. The information is presented in a logical sequence, making it easy to follow the trends in market share. However, transitions between some sentences and paragraphs could be smoother to enhance the flow of the report. For example, linking the overall trends mentioned in the second paragraph more explicitly to the detailed data in the subsequent paragraphs would improve coherence. Also, ensure that each paragraph focuses on a distinct aspect or group of manufacturers to maintain clarity.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary related to describing market share data. Terms like 'proportion,' 'fluctuated,' 'marginally,' and 'accounted for' are used appropriately. To further enhance the lexical resource, consider incorporating more varied synonyms and phrases to describe changes and trends. For instance, instead of repeatedly using 'increased,' you could use 'grew,' 'expanded,' or 'rose.' Also, try to use more precise language when describing the data to avoid ambiguity.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a reasonable command of grammar, but there are several errors that affect clarity. Subject-verb agreement errors, incorrect use of articles, and some awkward phrasing are present. For example, 'Fujitsu made up the least percenages' should be 'Fujitsu accounted for the smallest percentage.' Also, the sentence 'Samsung accounted for 11.6% in 2006, then decreased to 10.7% in 2007, before experiencing the increase to 14.20% in 2007' contains a typo and should refer to 2014 instead of the second 2007. Proofreading carefully and focusing on sentence structure will help improve grammatical accuracy.

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