Table

Band 8+: The table below shows the percentage participation of women in senior management in three companies between 1975 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The table below shows the percentage participation of women in senior management in three companies between 1975 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image displays a table titled "Percentage participation of women in senior management positions" for three companies across seven different years. Eldan Ltd percentages are 3% (1975), 3% (1980), 14% (1985), 28% (1990), 33% (2000), 64% (2015). Bamforth Ltd percentages are 9% (1975), 11% (1980), 13% (1985), 15% (1990), 17% (2000), 46% (2015). Finsbury Ltd percentages are 16% (1975), 14% (1980), 15% (1985), 22% (1990), 20% (2000), 26% (2015).

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The table illustrates the proportions of females enrolled in senior management in three different companies over four decades from 1975 to 2015.

Overall, Finsbury Ltd showed the highest figure in the first fifteen years, while Eldan Ltd surpassed it in the last twenty five years. Moreover, every company increased throughout the period with some exceptions in Finsbury Ltd, and reached their highest points in the last year.

Regarding Eldan Ltd, in the first five years between 1975 and 1980, it recorded 3% participation, being the lowest company in terms of percentages compared to Bamforth and Finsbury Ltd’s. However, its figure rose to 14% in 1985, doubled in 1990, and then recorded 64% in 2015, being the highest figure compared to others.

As for Bamforth Ltd, its figure gradually grew from 9% in the first year to 17% in 2000. After that, it has surged up to 46% in 2015.

Finsbury Ltd started as the highest figure at the beginning with 16%, then experienced insignificant dip by 2% in 1980. Furthermore, it increased to 22% in 1990, before a similar dip by 2% occured in 2000. In 2015, it reached 26%, being the lowest figure in the last year compared to other companies.

Word Count: 202

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

figure: 6

highest: 4

finsbury: 3

first: 3

years: 3

being: 3

compared: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report effectively addresses the task by providing an overview and highlighting key trends. It accurately describes the overall increases and makes relevant comparisons between the companies. Minor omissions, such as not mentioning the 1990 figure for Eldan Ltd (28%) and the 1985 figure for Bamforth Ltd (13%), are acceptable and do not detract from the overall clarity. The report is well-structured and covers the main features appropriately.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is well-organized and easy to follow. The introduction clearly presents the data, and the overview effectively highlights the main trends. The body paragraphs are logically divided by company, and the use of cohesive devices (e.g., 'Regarding', 'As for', 'Furthermore') helps guide the reader. However, there are minor lapses in cohesion, such as the phrase 'in the last twenty five years' which could be more precise, and the transition between the overview and the detailed paragraphs could be smoother. Overall, the structure is strong and the message is clear.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary with appropriate use of terms like 'proportions', 'participation', 'surpassed', 'recorded', and 'experienced'. There is some flexibility in phrasing, such as 'gradually grew' and 'surged up'. However, there are a few instances of less precise or slightly awkward word choices, such as 'insignificant dip' (which might be better as 'slight dip') and 'occured' (spelling error). The vocabulary is generally accurate and appropriate, but could be more sophisticated in places to achieve a higher band.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report uses a variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences and appropriate use of tenses. There are minor errors, such as 'occured' (should be 'occurred') and 'Finsbury Ltd's' (which is awkwardly phrased). The grammar is generally accurate, and the errors do not impede understanding. To improve, the writer could pay more attention to spelling and ensure that possessive forms are used correctly. Overall, the grammatical range is good, and the accuracy is high with only minor lapses.

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