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Band 5+: The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in great britain in 1992. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image contains two pie charts showing employment patterns for females and males in Great Britain in 1992, divided into manual and non-manual categories. For females: Managerial and professional (M & P) 29%, Clerical or related (C or R) 31%, Other non-manual (O N-M) 5%, Craft or similar (C or S) 1%, General labourers (G L) 3%, and Other manual (O M) 27%. For males: M & P 36%, C or R 6%, O N-M 2%, C or S 24%, G L 26%, and O M 6%. The categories are separated into manual and non-manual sections.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The two pie charts present the data of employment figures in Great Britain during 1992 year.

Overall, the given information is presented in two different pie charts, which describe female and male employees. The data is shown by the percentage. Moreover, there is a table with the names of the positions devided in two groups, Manual and Non-Manual.

Beginning with the pie chart representing female workers in Great Britain solely 1% of workers were general manual labourers. At the same time, general labourers though male workers were 2% of total number. Then the craft or similar manual patterns though female employees became 3%, while the same job for male workers was 24% of total. However, other manual between male and female was quiet similar, 27% of female workers and 26% of male workers.

Nevertheless, the figures of non-manual were higher for female workers. Managerial and professional patters amounted to 29%, and male’s was 36%. Female’s clerical or related jobs were 31%. However, for male employees this number was 6% of total. Finally, other non-manual positions were 9% for women and 6% for men.

Word Count: 183

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

female: 6

workers: 6

manual: 4

employees: 3

total: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report identifies some key features of the pie charts but lacks a clear overview and sufficient comparison between the employment patterns of males and females. The organization could be improved by grouping manual and non-manual jobs together for comparison. To improve, focus on providing a more comprehensive overview in the introduction, ensuring accurate data representation, and making direct comparisons between male and female employment patterns.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an attempt to organize the information, but the flow is somewhat disjointed. The introduction provides a general overview, but the subsequent paragraphs lack clear topic sentences and transitions, making it difficult to follow the comparisons between male and female employment patterns. Paragraphing could be improved to group related information more effectively. For instance, manual and non-manual categories could be discussed in separate paragraphs to enhance clarity. The use of cohesive devices is limited, resulting in a somewhat fragmented presentation of the data.

Lexical Resource

The report uses adequate vocabulary to describe the data, but there is room for improvement in terms of precision and variety. The language is generally functional, but the inclusion of more sophisticated vocabulary related to employment and statistical analysis could enhance the report. For example, instead of repeatedly using 'workers' or 'employees,' consider using synonyms like 'personnel,' 'workforce,' or 'labor force.' Additionally, varying the descriptive adjectives and adverbs could add nuance to the analysis.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement, incorrect tense usage, and awkward phrasing. For example, 'female workers in Great Britain solely 1% of workers were general manual labourers' is grammatically incorrect and unclear. Similarly, 'general labourers though male workers were 2% of total number' contains errors in word order and preposition usage. Correcting these errors and ensuring accurate sentence structure would significantly improve the report's overall quality. Focus on using a variety of sentence structures accurately to enhance grammatical range.

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Band 5+: The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in great britain in 1992. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in great britain in 1992. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in great britain in 1992. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in great britain in 1992. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two pie charts below show some employment patterns in great britain in 1992. summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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the charts below show the number of Japanese tourist travelling abroad between 1985 to 1995 and Australia's shares of the Japanese tourist market.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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