Pie Chart

Band 7+: The two pie charts below show the online shopping sales for the retail sectors in Australia in 2013 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: The two pie charts below show the online shopping sales for the retail sectors in Australia in 2013 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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The image displays two pie charts comparing online sales for retail sectors in Australia between 2013 and 2018. In 2013: Electronics & Appliances (35%), Food & Beverage (22%), Home Furnishings (25%), Video Games (18%). In 2018: Electronics & Appliances (30%), Food & Beverage (32%), Home Furnishings (23%), Video Games (15%).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The charts provide data on alterations in online trading rates for retailing in a five-year period since 2013 in Australia.

Overall, the leading figures in the pie charts changed throughout the period. Electronics and appliances remained one of the mainly sold products by 2018, along with food and beverages.

To begin with, electronic tools were the most popular product, standing at 35% in 2013. Second major figures were home furniture and food and drinks, accounting for 25% and 22% respectively. And finally, the least purchased items were video games, with 18% of all sales in the beginning of the period.

Five years later, electronics and appliances declined to 30%, giving up their position to food and beverage, which accounted for slightly more, namely 32%. Video games’ rate also increased to 23%, becoming the third most demanded product in the market. As for home furnishing, it stood at 15% by 2018, serving as the least necessary item.7

Word Count: 156

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The report addresses the task by summarizing the main features of the pie charts and making comparisons. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g., video games' rate increased to 23% - it actually decreased to 15%). To improve, ensure all data cited is accurate and pay close attention to detail when extracting information from the charts. Also, the final sentence is awkwardly phrased and contains a factual error. Consider rephrasing for clarity and accuracy.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally well-organized with a clear overall structure. The information is presented logically, and the progression of ideas is easy to follow. However, transitions between some sentences and paragraphs could be smoother to enhance the flow. Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to connect ideas more effectively.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, appropriate for the task. There is accurate use of lexical items related to describing proportions and changes. To further enhance the lexical resource, consider incorporating more sophisticated vocabulary related to market trends and consumer behavior. For example, instead of 'mainly sold products,' you could use 'dominant sectors' or 'leading categories.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a good command of grammar with generally accurate sentence structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not significantly impede understanding. To improve further, pay attention to verb tense consistency and correct use of articles and prepositions. For example, review the sentence 'Video games' rate also increased to 23%...' for better phrasing.

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