Letter

Band 6+: You borrowed a valuable camera from your uncle for a trip, but during the trip, the camera was stolen from your bag while you were not looking. Write a letter to your uncle apologizing for the loss. Include details about: what happened to the camera and how it was stolen; why you are sorry for the loss and the trust broken; what you intend to do to compensate for the loss.

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Dear Uncle,

I would like to thank you for lending your camera for my vacation here in America. Unfortunately, during my travel I had a problem that I encountered.

While walking around the City of Vegas, I did not notice that your camera was stolen in my bag. I tried to ask for assistance to the near police station to find out what happened, however they have told me that there was no cctv around the area.

I am so sorry for the the lost of your trust and for the camera. I know that I should be more careful everytime with my belongings since I do not know the place and the people around me. I would like to let you know that I am willing to do anything just to compensate for the lost of your camera

Thank you for your understanding, and I hope you will still trust me.

Respectfully,

Cherich

Word Count: 154

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

camera: 3

around: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses all three bullet points: it explains how the camera was stolen, apologizes for the loss and broken trust, and states an intention to compensate. The tone is appropriate and the letter is generally clear. However, there are some lapses: the phrase 'the lost of your trust' and 'the lost of your camera' are grammatically incorrect (should be 'loss'), and the compensation offer is vague ('willing to do anything'). To improve, specify a concrete plan for compensation and proofread for grammatical accuracy.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by awkward phrasing and minor lapses in cohesion. For example, the transition from thanking your uncle to describing the incident could be smoother. Use linking words and phrases to connect ideas more naturally, such as 'Unfortunately,' 'As a result,' and 'In addition.' Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and that the progression of events is easy to follow.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, but there are some inaccuracies and repetitions. For instance, 'lost' is used instead of 'loss' in several places, and 'everytime' should be 'every time.' To improve, use a wider range of precise vocabulary, such as 'deeply regret,' 'compensate for the loss,' and 'safeguard my belongings.' Avoid informal or incorrect terms like 'cctv' (use 'CCTV' or 'security cameras') and 'the City of Vegas' (use 'Las Vegas').

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. For example, 'the the lost' should be 'the loss,' 'stolen in my bag' should be 'stolen from my bag,' and 'they have told me' should be 'they told me.' Additionally, the sentence 'I would like to thank you for lending your camera for my vacation here in America' is awkward; consider 'I am writing to thank you for lending me your camera for my vacation in America.' Work on subject-verb agreement, correct use of prepositions, and consistent verb tenses. Proofread to eliminate typos and ensure proper punctuation.

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