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Letter

Band 5+: You borrowed a valuable item from a friend a while ago, and now it's damaged. Write a letter to your friend. - Apologize for the damage. - Explain how the damage occurred. - Suggest a way to compensate them for the damage.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear Jane,

Hi, Jane. How are you? I hope everything is going well with you. I am sorry for writing this letter to you because i have a bad news for you. Do you remember about the earphone that i borrowed from you last month when we were at train station while we would to back to Jakarta? the earphone was broken by me.

Firstly, I really apologize for my negligence. The cronology was when i stopped listen the music, puted it on my pants, and then i forgot to took it out from my pants. A weeks later, when i washed my clothes, i just realize that your earphone still inside in my pants. I thought that i were put it at the safe place and i still don’t realize until i saw this incident happened.

If you don’t mind, let me buy the new one for you or could you give me the price of it? I will pay it for you to change the broken one. Once again, I am sorry.

Warm Regards,

Joce

Word Count: 177

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Overall Band Score

5.5
(+/- 0.5)
Vocabulary Complexity:
A1 - Beginner
Aim to use more advanced language.
Grammar Mistakes: N/A
Vocabulary Repetition:
earphone: 3
pants: 3
Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

7
The letter appropriately addresses all requirements of the task. The apology is clear, the explanation of the damage is detailed, and a suggestion for compensation is provided. There are a few minor grammatical errors, but they do not significantly detract from the overall quality of the response. To improve, focus on refining grammar and sentence structure for greater clarity.

Coherence & Cohesion

5
The letter is generally coherent, but the organization could be improved. Consider structuring the letter with clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to enhance readability. For example, dedicate a paragraph solely to the apology, another to the explanation, and a final one to the compensation offer. Transition words could also be used more effectively to link ideas within and between paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement. Try to use more varied and precise language to express your ideas. For instance, instead of just saying 'bad news,' you could use a more specific phrase like 'unfortunate news' or 'disheartening news.' Also, consider using synonyms to avoid repetition of words like 'sorry.' Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

4
The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Pay close attention to verb tense consistency, correct article usage (a/an/the), and subject-verb agreement. For example, 'puted it on my pants' should be 'put it in my pants,' and 'A weeks later' should be 'A week later.' Proofreading carefully before submitting can help catch these errors.

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