Letter

Band 6+: You enrolled in a course at a local community center, but you are not satisfied with the quality of the instruction. Write a letter to the community center director to complain about the course. You should include details about: - The name of the course and when it started - What aspects of the course you are unhappy with - What you would like the community center to do about the situation

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Dear Sir,

I am writing to give feedbacks about the recently held Community development initiaive programme, that featured several lectures and courses centered around indigenous Peoples.

Firslty, I want to appreciate the planning commitee that put this together, it is a very welcome and innovative development and a good step towards an inclusive Society. I signed up for the Indigenous health and perspective course and it was supposed to be taught by Dr. Ambi. However, there was a last minute change and Dr. Poki; the current indigenous Peoples coordinator took it instead.

While I applaud his efforts, especially since it was impromtu, he did not really address the issues I was hoping he would touch on. I signed up because I wanted an insight into how indigenous Peoples approached health issues like contemporary medicine and interventions, but he ended up giving a lecture on indigenous history and ways. I was not pleased with this.

I would like to request that the center should address this by providing the original lecture notes Dr. Ambi prepared, to those that signed up. This could be sent in e-format.

I look forward to your kind consideration.

Yours Faithfully,

Muobo Dede

Word Count: 196

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

indigenous: 5

signed: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses all requirements of the task, providing relevant details about the course, dissatisfaction, and desired action. The content is well-organized and clearly presented. To further enhance the response, consider elaborating slightly more on the specific aspects of the course that were dissatisfying, providing more concrete examples.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is generally well-organized and easy to follow. The purpose of the letter is clear from the beginning, and the progression of ideas is logical. However, there are a few areas where coherence could be improved. For instance, the transition between the appreciation for the planning committee and the specific issue with the course could be smoother. Consider using transitional phrases to link ideas more explicitly.

Lexical Resource

The letter demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, using appropriate and relevant terms related to the topic. Words like 'initiative,' 'indigenous,' 'impromptu,' and 'contemporary' are well-used. To further enhance the lexical resource, consider incorporating more nuanced vocabulary to express the dissatisfaction and desired resolution more precisely. For example, instead of 'I was not pleased with this,' you could use a more specific phrase that conveys the level of disappointment.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter demonstrates a good command of grammar with a variety of sentence structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not significantly impede understanding. Pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and correct usage of articles. Reviewing the letter for these minor errors before submission can improve the overall impression.

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