Letter

Band 6+: You have been working with your company for two years and are interested in a promotion. Write a letter to your direct boss. In your letter: • Explain your varied a chivements over the past two years • Express your interest in growing with the company pilot • Ask for a meeting to discuss a potential promotion.

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Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this letter to express my desire about getting promoted as a senior manager in our company. I have been working as supervisor from past two years in the project management field.

Firstly , I want to share my contribution to the firm’s name and fame at the national level. I have worked day and night to crack the deal with the most successful organization of our country and achieved it. Moreover, I have been awarded as best employee for continuously last two years.

Secondly ,I want to share my keen interest in being a part of this firm for longer period of time and learn more skills for my better future. Apart from this , I want to seen our company growing globally in next few years.

Lastly ,I would like to request you to arrange a meeting in upcoming week before long weekend so that we could discuss about the criteria of promotion.

I am looking forward to your positive response.

Yours sincerely,

Bavneet

Word Count: 172

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The letter addresses all three bullet points: it explains achievements, expresses interest in growing with the company, and requests a meeting. The tone is appropriate and the purpose is clear. However, there are some lapses in clarity and formality (e.g., 'I want to seen' should be 'I want to see', 'crack the deal' is informal, and the salutation 'Dear Sir or Madam' is less suitable when writing to a known boss). To improve, use a more formal and precise register, ensure grammatical accuracy, and consider addressing the boss by name for a more personal touch.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is logically organized into paragraphs, each addressing a specific point from the task. However, the flow is somewhat disrupted by awkward phrasing and minor lapses in cohesion (e.g., 'I want to seen our company growing globally' and 'we could discuss about the criteria'). The use of cohesive devices is basic but functional. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and use more varied linking words (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'In addition') to enhance smooth transitions.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate for the task, with some good attempts at formal language (e.g., 'express my desire', 'contribution to the firm's name and fame'). However, there are instances of imprecise or informal word choices (e.g., 'crack the deal', 'day and night', 'better future'). To achieve a higher score, use more precise and professional vocabulary (e.g., 'negotiate a contract', 'dedicated effort', 'professional development') and avoid colloquial expressions.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors and awkward structures that affect clarity. Examples include: 'I have been working as supervisor from past two years' (should be 'for the past two years'), 'I want to seen' (should be 'I want to see'), and 'we could discuss about' (should be 'discuss'). Punctuation issues, such as missing spaces after commas, also appear. To improve, focus on using a wider range of sentence structures (e.g., complex sentences) and proofread for subject-verb agreement, prepositions, and article usage.

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