Letter

Band 7+: You have bought a new mobile phone and in few days of purchase, it has stopped working. You have spoken to the company representative a week ago but it has still not been repaired. Write a letter to the company. In your letter , - Introduce yourself - Explain the situation - Say what action you would like the company to take You should write at least 150 words

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Dear Sir or Madam,

I purchased a brand new Samsung Smartphone from one your stores. I was delighted to purchase it but frustrated to find that it stopped working in a few days of use. I am hoping you would replace it with a new one as I am entitled to a two-year replacement warranty.

I purchased a Galaxy Grand Prime Plus mobile phone from your Madison Avenue store on 24th September. The phone worked fine for first week, but then suddenly froze and stopped working. Since I have a valid replacement warranty, I immediately sent it to your store on Madison Avenue on 2nd october. The customer service representantive promises me that the phone will be checked and a new phone will be dispatched to my house address soon. But to my dismay, when I spoke to this person two days ago, I was shocked to discover that the phone has not been checked yet ! Because of this, I have been without a phone for which I have paid a good amout of money.

As per the contract, I am entitled to get my phone replaced. Therefore, I expect you to ship me a brand new cell phone withing a week. Otherwise, I would be forced to seek legal advise.

Thank you in advance for your cooperation and actions.

Yours sincerely,

Muhammad

Word Count: 224

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Overall Band Score

7.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

phone: 8

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter appropriately addresses all parts of the task, providing a clear introduction, explanation of the problem, and desired action. The tone is suitable for a formal complaint. To further enhance the letter, consider adding specific details about the model number or any reference numbers related to the purchase or warranty. Also, while the threat of legal action is present, softening the tone slightly might be more effective in achieving a positive resolution.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is well-organized and the message is generally clear. The paragraphing is logical, with a clear introduction, explanation of the problem, and desired action. However, the transition between some ideas could be smoother. For instance, elaborating slightly more on the impact of being without a phone could strengthen the letter's coherence. Also, ensure consistent use of pronouns and clear references to avoid any ambiguity.

Lexical Resource

A good range of vocabulary is used appropriately. Phrases like 'to my dismay' and 'entitled to' are well-placed. To further enhance the lexical resource, consider using more varied synonyms and idiomatic expressions where appropriate to demonstrate a wider command of the English language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter demonstrates a good command of grammar with a variety of sentence structures. While generally accurate, there are a few minor errors that could be corrected. For example, double-check subject-verb agreement and tense consistency throughout the letter. Paying attention to these details will improve the overall grammatical accuracy.

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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