Letter

Band 5+: You have found out that a building company is planning to build new houses on a green space close to your home. You are concerned about this development.Write a letter to the building company. In your letter:Say how you found out about their plan.Explain why you are concerned about this proposed development.Suggest what you think the company should do instead.

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Dear Sir/ Madam,

I hope you are doing well. I am writing this epistle to express my thoughts regarding the company’s plan to construct new homes near by my locality. Primarily, I would like to mention I read the local newspaper from where I got such an excited news. After few days, I received letter from council.

Also, I would love to provide my point of regarding the plan and I feel incredible because nowadays population are increasing at fast pace due to this everyone can afford their own house. Apart from this, this idea will also increase job opportunities for many construction workers.

Given the situation, I would request you to construct some essential areas such as a park and community center for masses as these will give chance to play and spend time outside the home for children and elderly people. Moreover, please make sure to build wider roads so road congestions will not happen in the future.

Thank you for considering my feedback.

Your faithfully,

Manjinder Kaur

Word Count: 170

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

would: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses all three prompts required by the task. The candidate explains how they heard about the plan, provides a clear opinion (positive), and suggests specific improvements (parks, community centers, and wider roads). However, there are some issues with word choice and tone that prevent a higher score. For example, the word 'epistle' is overly formal and archaic for a letter to a business manager, and 'excited news' should be 'exciting news.' Additionally, some grammatical inaccuracies (e.g., 'population are increasing,' 'provide my point of regarding') slightly affect the clarity. To improve, focus on using more natural, modern collocations and ensure subject-verb agreement is consistent throughout the text.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter follows the required structure and addresses all three bullet points, which helps the logical flow. However, the transitions between ideas are somewhat abrupt. To improve, use more sophisticated cohesive devices. For example, instead of starting sentences with 'Also' or 'Apart from this' in a repetitive manner, try using subordinating conjunctions or more formal transitional phrases like 'Furthermore' or 'In addition to the economic benefits.' Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic sentence.

Lexical Resource

There is an attempt to use higher-level vocabulary (e.g., 'construct,' 'essential,' 'congestions'), but some words are used incorrectly or in an unnatural way. For instance, 'epistle' is far too formal and archaic for a letter to a business manager; 'letter' or 'correspondence' would be more appropriate. 'Excited news' should be 'exciting news,' and 'masses' sounds slightly impersonal in this context. Focus on learning collocations (words that naturally go together) to ensure your word choices sound natural to a native speaker.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede the clarity of your message. There are issues with article usage (e.g., 'received letter' should be 'received a letter'), subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'population are increasing' should be 'population is increasing'), and preposition usage (e.g., 'point of regarding' is incorrect). Additionally, some sentence structures are fragmented. To improve, practice using a variety of complex sentence structures and pay close attention to singular/plural nouns and their corresponding verbs.

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