Letter

Band 6+: You have had a bank account for a few years. Recently you received a letter from the hank stating that your account is $240 overdrawn and that you will he charged $70 which will be taken directly from your account. You know that this information is incorrect. Write a letter to the bank. Explain what has happened and say what you would like them to do about it.

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Dear Sir or Madam,

I am writing this regarding a letter I received from your bank that 240$ have been overdrawn from my account, and now I have been charged 70$. However, I have not made any transaction of 240$ recently.

To begin with, I have been using this account for several years, and I have attached all the previous transaction receipts for your verification. That clearly shows that I have no recent transaction activity. I would really appreciate it if you could verify this from the Head Office, as I believe there might be a technical issue which shows the 240$ overdrawn. Due to this, I have been charged 70$, which is a huge amount for a final-year student like me, who is clearly struggling in a foreign country. Moreover, I would be grateful if 70$ can be refunded back to my account.

I hope you will look into this matter at your earliest convenience. Kindly inform me if you neeed further information. I look forward to your prompt response.

Yours truly,

Mahnoor.

Word Count: 174

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Overall Band Score

6.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

transaction: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses the task appropriately, explaining the situation and requesting a refund. However, there are minor omissions: it does not explicitly state that the account is not overdrawn or request a correction of the bank's records. To improve, clearly state that the overdraft is incorrect and ask for the account to be corrected, in addition to the refund.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The sequence of ideas is easy to follow, and paragraphing is appropriate. However, some cohesive devices are overused or slightly awkward (e.g., 'To begin with' and 'Moreover'), and the connection between the overdrawn amount and the charge could be made more explicit. Consider using a wider range of linking phrases and ensuring each paragraph has a clear central topic.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is generally appropriate and accurate, with some good formal expressions (e.g., 'I would really appreciate it if you could verify', 'at your earliest convenience'). However, there is some repetition (e.g., '240$' and '70$' are repeated frequently) and a few informal or imprecise phrases (e.g., 'a huge amount for a final-year student like me, who is clearly struggling in a foreign country' could be more concise and formal). Try to use synonyms and more precise financial terms to enhance lexical range.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains a mix of simple and complex structures, but there are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings that affect clarity. For example, '240$ have been overdrawn' should be '240$ has been overdrawn' (subject-verb agreement), 'which shows the 240$ overdrawn' is unclear, and 'if 70$ can be refunded back' is redundant ('refunded' already implies 'back'). Additionally, there is a spelling error: 'neeed' should be 'need'. To improve, proofread carefully and ensure subject-verb agreement, correct use of articles, and clarity in complex sentences.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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