Letter

Band 6+: You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

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Dear Sir/Madam,

I am writing with regart to an accessory for my bedroom I have bought online on September, 23rd. The bedside table came on time but unfortunately not in a original packaging. I would like to bring your attention that I ordered the new one and not a used table. When I opened the packaging, I realised the table was damaged on the right side. It seems that the table was wrongly transported. A corner is broken.I am really disappointed about it. Small damage I could fix by myself, but not in this case. Of course I would send the table back on my own costs.

I would appreciate it if you could change the table and resend a new one. I have always been satisfied with your online shop and I would love to stay as a regular customer.

I look forward to hearing from you.

Yours faithfully,

Julia T.

Word Count: 152

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

table: 6

would: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The letter addresses the task appropriately, covering the key points: the damaged item, the problem, and a request for a replacement. The tone is polite and the purpose is clear. However, there are a few minor omissions and lapses that prevent it from achieving a higher score. For instance, the letter does not explicitly state the need for the shop to cover the return shipping costs, which is a common expectation in such situations. Additionally, the phrase 'with regart' is a typo for 'with regard', and the date format 'September, 23rd' is slightly awkward. To improve, ensure all relevant details are included, such as requesting a refund or replacement and specifying who should bear the return costs. Also, proofread for minor errors to enhance clarity and professionalism.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter is logically organized with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. However, the flow is sometimes disrupted by abrupt transitions and missing connectors. For example, the sentence 'A corner is broken.' could be better integrated with the previous sentence. Additionally, the phrase 'Small damage I could fix by myself, but not in this case.' could be rephrased for smoother cohesion. Consider using linking words like 'Furthermore' or 'In addition' to connect ideas more naturally.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is generally appropriate for the task, but there are some inaccuracies and informal choices. For instance, 'regart' should be 'regard', and 'not in a original packaging' should be 'not in its original packaging'. The phrase 'bring your attention' is slightly awkward; 'draw your attention' is more natural. The letter would benefit from more precise and varied vocabulary, such as 'replace' instead of 'change' and 'at my own expense' instead of 'on my own costs'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Examples include: 'I have bought' should be 'I bought' (past simple for a specific time), 'on September, 23rd' should be 'on September 23rd', 'not in a original packaging' should be 'not in its original packaging', and 'on my own costs' should be 'at my own expense'. Additionally, the sentence 'Small damage I could fix by myself, but not in this case.' is grammatically awkward; consider 'I could fix small damage myself, but not in this case.' The letter would benefit from more varied sentence structures and careful proofreading.

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Band 6+: You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

You recently bought a piece of electronic equipment from a local store, but it has developed a problem after only a few days of use. Write a letter to the store manager.

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Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

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