Letter

Band 4+: You recently purchased a product online, but it arrived with a significant defect. Write a letter to the company explaining the situation. You should include details about: - the product you purchased and the date of purchase - the nature of the defect - what action you would like the company to take.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear respected sir, madam

I recently got my pair of shoe which i have order from the shoe factory through their instagram page, the shoe they have sent me was damaged

The pair of shoe i ordered from them was the mixutre of red and black in color. The brand of the shoe was jordan. I ordered these pair of shoe at 17 july and after 15 days I received my pair of shoe but when i was unboxing i found that the shoe your company had sent my damaged.

The color of the shoe has faded aways and there is a hole at the bottom of the shoe. I would really want to send me the next pair of shoe with compensation. And i want your staff to apologize to me because when i infromed them about the problem there respond was not good and they were very rude.

Word Count: 150

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:
No noticeable repetition! Great job!

Task Response

The letter addresses the main points of the task, but there are some areas for improvement. The details of the product and the damage are explained, but the letter could benefit from more specific information. The desired action is stated, but the reasoning could be stronger. To improve, focus on providing more concrete details and elaborating on the impact of the damage. Also, pay attention to tone and ensure it remains professional and polite, even when expressing dissatisfaction.

Coherence & Cohesion

The letter's organization is somewhat unclear, and the flow of information could be improved. Consider structuring your letter with a clear introduction, body paragraphs detailing the product, damage, and desired action, and a concise conclusion. Using more cohesive devices (e.g., transition words, pronouns) would help link ideas and improve readability.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and somewhat repetitive. Try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to online shopping, product descriptions, and complaints. For example, instead of 'the shoe they have sent me was damaged,' you could say 'the shoe I received was defective' or 'the shoe arrived in a damaged condition.' Using more precise language will enhance the clarity and impact of your message.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The letter contains several grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward phrasing. For example, 'I recently got my pair of shoe which i have order' should be 'I recently received the pair of shoes that I ordered.' Pay close attention to sentence structure and verb tense consistency. Proofreading carefully before submitting your writing can help identify and correct these errors.

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