Multiple Graphs

Band 4+: You should spend about 20 minutes on this task The charts below describe 4 sectors of employment, in 2009 and 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

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Image for topic: You should spend about 20 minutes on this task The charts below describe 4 sectors of employment, in 2009 and 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

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The image displays employment distribution in four sectors within Town A for years 2009 and 2020 via two circular charts; in 2009, Manufacturing accounts for 60%, Hospitality 11%, Engineering 9%, Teaching 20%; by 2020, Manufacturing remains at 60%, Hospitality adjusts to 17%, Engineering 8%, Teaching 15%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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this chart shows four industries of employment in 2009 and 2020 . it is clear from the chart that , the Engineering has descreased from 60 percent to 8 percent while the Manufacturing has increased from 20 percent to 60 percent .

According to what is shown , in 2009 the engineering is the higher sector and the teaching is the lower sector but in 2020 the Manufacturing has rose significantly . Also the Engineering has fell dramatically in 2020 . in contrast the Teaching was almost steadily while the Hospitality has grew slightly in 2020 .

To sum up , we could say that the teaching has grew by 1 percent between the two years also the Hospitality has rose by 3 percent in 2020 . The Engneering has a big diffrent between the two years because it has dropped by 43 percent while the Manufacturing has grew by 49 percent .

Word Count: 153

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

percent: 8

engineering: 3

while: 3

manufacturing: 3

teaching: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains significant inaccuracies in data reporting that obscure the main trends. For example, the report claims Engineering decreased from 60% to 8%, whereas the data indicates Manufacturing was the sector at 60%. There is also a contradiction where Manufacturing is described as both increasing from 20% to 60% and rising significantly, while the actual data shows it remained stable at 60%. To improve, focus on accurately identifying which sector corresponds to which percentage and ensure that the comparisons made between the two years are mathematically consistent with the provided data. Additionally, work on grammatical accuracy regarding verb tenses (e.g., 'has rose' should be 'has risen').

Coherence & Cohesion

The organization of the report is somewhat logical, but the progression of ideas is hindered by repetitive sentence structures and poor transitions. The use of cohesive devices is limited and often inaccurate. To improve, try to group information more effectively - for example, by grouping sectors that increased together and sectors that decreased together. Avoid starting every sentence with a simple subject-verb structure; instead, use subordinating conjunctions like 'while', 'whereas', or 'although' to create more complex and fluid connections between ideas.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is quite basic and contains several spelling errors (e.g., 'descreased', 'Engneering', 'diffrent'). There is also a lack of variety in word choice, with many words being repeated. To reach a higher band, aim to use a wider range of synonyms for 'increase' (e.g., rose, climbed, surged) and 'decrease' (e.g., declined, dropped, plummeted). Additionally, ensure that you use the correct forms of words, such as using the noun 'difference' instead of the adjective 'different' in certain contexts. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical accuracy is a significant issue in this report. There are frequent errors in verb tense and participle forms (e.g., 'has rose', 'has fell', 'has grew', 'has grew'), which are incorrect; the correct forms should be 'has risen', 'has fallen', and 'has grown'. There are also issues with article usage (e.g., 'the Engineering') and sentence punctuation. Focus on mastering the present perfect tense and ensuring that subject-verb agreement is consistent throughout your writing. Practicing the distinction between past simple and present perfect will greatly improve your accuracy.

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Band 4+: You should spend about 20 minutes on this task The charts below describe 4 sectors of employment, in 2009 and 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task The charts below describe 4 sectors of employment, in 2009 and 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task The charts below describe 4 sectors of employment, in 2009 and 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task The charts below describe 4 sectors of employment, in 2009 and 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task The charts below describe 4 sectors of employment, in 2009 and 2020. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words

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Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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