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Letter

Band 5+: You work in an office and have recently been experiencing a health problem. You think that the problem started because of the working conditions in the office. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter • describe the health problem • explain why you think it was caused by conditions in the office • suggest what the manager should do to improve the working conditions in the office

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear Mr. Shashimal chandrapala,

Last Monday I channeled a visiting practitioner, because I was suffering from severe headache that I could not bear. The specialist advised me to contact eye surgeon immediately for further investigation. According to that I visited eye clinic, I get to know that my eyes getting week continuously. Furthermore, Short distance blindness possible in near future, to overcome this issue, the Doctor advised me to avoid LED screens specifically under law flux condition.

Therefore, I believe the reason behind this is might be my working condition at the office. In my section, I work whole day in front of the computer screen, and we received light from very law watt LED bulb which gives law light condition.

Thus, I kindly request you to change the working environment by applying a good light condition and introducing LED screen-protector for every device that staff use for the well-being of the employees.

Thank you for your kind consideration with regards.

Yours faithful

Sayumi Ayansa

Word Count: 165

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Overall Band Score

5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

light: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

6.5

The letter adequately addresses all parts of the task. The description of the health problem, the explanation of its potential cause, and the suggestions for improvement are all present. However, the connection between the problem and the office conditions could be more clearly and convincingly established.

Coherence & Cohesion

5

The letter's message is mostly understandable, but the flow could be improved. Some sentences are awkwardly phrased, impacting the overall coherence. Better paragraphing and sentence structure would enhance readability and cohesion.

Lexical Resource

4.5

The vocabulary used is appropriate for the context, but there's room for improvement in terms of range and precision. More sophisticated vocabulary choices would enhance the overall impact of the letter.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

3.5

The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity and fluency. Improving grammatical accuracy is crucial for achieving a higher score. Consider proofreading carefully before submission.

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