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Letter

Band 6+: You would like to participate in a work-related seminar in another country. Write a letter to the person in charge of the seminar and ask for detailed information regarding the dates, program, accommodation and cost.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

Dear Sir or Madam,

Hope you are doing great. I am writing to inquire about the seminar that will be held in your country Canada this coming year.

I am excited to take part in this function. Therefore, I want to know about this. Firstly, could you please tell me the timings such as at which time and date it will starts . Secondly, I want to know about the program list. For instance, How many activities, or tasks involved in this seminar. Also, is it mandatory to take part in this or some are optional.

Moreover, another question in my list is the accommodation . Do we need to arrange our stay or your company will sponsor hotel for all four nights? Lastly, it would be great if you could provide me an estimation of its cost such as entry ticket prices, food costs, and all other expenses. As, it will not only be convinient for me to book my flight but also help me to arrange all expenses on time. I do not want to miss this opportunity.

I am looking forward to your prompt response.

Yours faithfully,

Gurpreet.

Word Count: 191

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Overall Band Score

6
(+/- 0.5)
Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.
Grammar Mistakes: N/A
Vocabulary Repetition:
about: 3
Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

8
The letter appropriately covers all requirements of the task, asking about dates, program, accommodation, and cost. The questions are relevant and sufficiently detailed. There are a few minor areas for improvement, such as refining the phrasing in certain sentences for greater clarity and conciseness. For example, instead of 'Firstly, could you please tell me the timings such as at which time and date it will starts,' you could write 'Could you please provide the exact dates and times of the seminar?' Overall, the letter is well-written and effectively communicates the necessary information.

Coherence & Cohesion

5
The letter is generally organized, but the flow could be improved with better transitions between questions. Consider using more formal connectors and signposting language to guide the reader through your inquiries. For example, you could use phrases like 'In addition to this' or 'Furthermore' to link your questions more smoothly. Paragraphing is adequate, but ensure each paragraph focuses on a single aspect to enhance clarity.

Lexical Resource

5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task, but there's room for improvement in using more precise and varied language. For instance, instead of 'this function,' you could use 'this seminar' or 'this event.' Try to incorporate more specific vocabulary related to seminars and logistics to demonstrate a broader lexical range. Also, be mindful of using overly informal language in a formal letter.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

5
The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Pay close attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and proper article usage. For example, 'it will starts' should be 'it will start,' and 'convinient' should be 'convenient.' Proofread carefully to catch these errors. While a range of structures is attempted, accuracy needs improvement to ensure the message is conveyed effectively.

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