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Band 4+: Nowadays, many young people prefer to work as freelancers rather than having a permanent job in a company. Why is this trend increasing? Do you think this is a good trend for the economy?

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Work is essential in adult life. A significant number of individuals support freelance work rather than permanent jobs. This essay will discuss the reasons behind this trend and explain why I believe it is bad trend for economy.

There are several reasons for this trend. Firstly, many young people prefer freedom and flexible work time and having social life rather than stricts work hours. This is because they want to live the moment and they do not think about their future. In addition, nowadays, worker who works as freelancers have more income than worker in permanent job. So, many people prefer their private sector more than puplic one. Because this leads to higher income. For example, a CEO salary in great company is around 14000$ monthly , whereas a person who have a youtube channel get around 30000$ monthly.

However, I believe this trend may harm the economy because it is leads to decrease the goveroment tax which earend by worker salary. In addition, this trend may lead to left many company without worker. For example, in 2025, in google company many people resigned from their positions because one sucessful co-worker earned 3 million from freelance work.

In conclusion, although there are some advantages of freelancers, I believe that permanent job is more stable and provide bring the economy with a positive development.

Word Count: 223

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

trend: 5

because: 4

worker: 4

permanent: 3

believe: 3

people: 3

their: 3

company: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses both parts of the prompt, but the development of ideas is limited. While a position is stated, the arguments lack depth and logical precision. For instance, the claim that freelancers earn more than CEOs is a significant generalization that lacks nuance, and the connection between freelancing and a decrease in government tax revenue is not fully explained (as freelancers are still required to pay taxes). To improve, you should aim to extend your ideas by explaining the 'how' and 'why' more thoroughly. Instead of relying on extreme or potentially unrealistic examples, focus on explaining the logical consequences of your points. Additionally, ensure that your supporting arguments directly support your central thesis to maintain a clear and cohesive progression of thought. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay follows a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is sometimes interrupted by abrupt sentences and logical leaps. For instance, the connection between wanting to 'live the moment' and preferring freelance work could be more smoothly explained. To improve, use a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., 'Consequently,' 'Furthermore,' 'As a result') and ensure that each sentence flows logically into the next to create a more seamless reading experience.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is functional but quite basic and repetitive (e.g., using 'worker' and 'trend' frequently). There are also several spelling errors such as 'puplic', 'earend', and 'sucessful'. To reach a higher band, aim to use more precise and sophisticated academic vocabulary. Instead of 'bad trend', you could use 'detrimental trend'; instead of 'get around', you could use 'generate approximately'. Additionally, ensure correct word forms are used (e.g., 'strict work hours' instead of 'stricts'). Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and occasionally impede the reader's understanding. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'a person who have' should be 'a person who has'), article usage, and sentence structure (e.g., 'it is leads to decrease'). There is also a tendency to use short, simple sentences. To improve, practice using complex sentence structures such as relative clauses and conditional sentences, and pay close attention to singular/plural agreement and verb tenses.

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