Advantage And Disadvantage

Band 4+: Some people have decided to reduce the number of times they fly every year or to stop flying altogether. Do you think the environmental benefits of this development outweigh the disadvantages for individuals and businesses? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Some people choose to fly less often or even stop flying altogether. Although this may be good for the environment, I do not think the benefits are greater than the disadvantages for people and businesses.

On the one hand, flying less means it can help reduce pollution. Airplanes produce pollutions so fewer flights may be better for the environment. In addition, people should choose another way of transport such as trains or busses which can be more less harmful. Therefore, reducing usage of planes may have some positive impacts for the environment.

On the other hand, there are some disadvantages. For many people especially those who always need to travel far for business purposes or individuals that’s craving for new experiences, flying is the easiest and quickest way to travel. If people decide to stop flying, traveling could become more difficult and take much longer time. For businesses they often depend on air travel to meet customers and conduct business activities. If they wont be able to fly, this might cause some companies to lose money and opportunities.

in conclusion, flying less may help to reduce pollution, but I believe that the disadvantages for individuals and businesses are more significant. Therefore, the environmental benefits.

Word Count: 204

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

people: 5

flying: 5

disadvantages: 3

travel: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses all parts of the prompt and presents a clear position that the disadvantages outweigh the benefits. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. The environmental benefits are mentioned briefly but lack depth, and the discussion on disadvantages remains somewhat superficial. To improve, try to extend your arguments by explaining the 'why' and 'how' in more detail. For example, instead of just saying businesses might lose money, you could explain how global supply chains or international partnerships rely on the speed of air travel. Additionally, ensure the conclusion is a complete sentence; the final sentence in your essay is a fragment and does not convey a finished thought. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay follows a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is somewhat abrupt. The conclusion is incomplete, ending mid-sentence ('Therefore, the environmental benefits.'), which significantly disrupts the logical flow. To improve, ensure that every paragraph leads naturally into the next and that the conclusion provides a complete summary of your final stance.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is functional but quite basic and repetitive (e.g., using 'pollution' and 'fly/flying' multiple times). There are also some errors in word choice and formation, such as 'produce pollutions' (pollution is uncountable) and 'more less harmful' (which is contradictory). Aim to use a wider range of synonyms, such as 'aviation,' 'carbon footprint,' 'emissions,' or 'traveling by air,' to demonstrate a more sophisticated vocabulary. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There is a mix of simple and complex sentence attempts, but frequent errors occur. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('individuals that's craving'), incorrect use of future tense ('If they wont be able to'), and punctuation/capitalization errors (starting the conclusion with a lowercase 'in'). To improve, focus on mastering conditional sentences (If + present, will + verb) and ensuring that all sentences are grammatically complete and properly capitalized.

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