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Band 4+: Students in school should learn academic subjects and pass exam. Other skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwark can be learnt well from family and friends. Do you agree or disagree?

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In today’s time, some people firmly believed that school should give priority to important subjects and there examination becuase it is better for them to learn this skill like cookery, dressmaking and woodworking by their family. This essay, will discuss the both view point with proper example and relevant reasons before reaching meaningful conclusion.

In old time, the means of livelihood were limited. So, it was necessary for the people to learn different skills to run their life. Due to this , skills such as woodworking and dressmaking passes from one generation to other. Perhaps, skill like cookery was the primary need for the females which continue till now.

In contrast, nowadays, the people can earn through various ways. which reduces the important of skill like dressmaking and wood making. That’s why, the number of people involved in this activities decrease at high rate. Due to this, the many people hardly believed that this skills should be learn by the family according to their needs. While, school should focus on subjects which help in students development

For example, a student of wood making will earn according to the demand of wood making things. Conversely the student having good academic can grab a high paying job.

To sum up, the skills were helpful at the old times due to less medium of earning but now, with the increase in means of earning, this skills become secondary. So, school should give teaching about subjects which are related with future instead of this skills.

Word Count: 251

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

skills: 6

people: 5

should: 4

which: 4

school: 3

subjects: 3

learn: 3

skill: 3

dressmaking: 3

their: 3

making: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the main parts of the prompt and presents a position, but the development is limited and lacks clarity. The introduction states the topic but does not clearly outline the writer's stance. The body paragraphs provide some relevant ideas (e.g., historical importance of skills, current earning opportunities), but they are not well-developed or supported with specific examples. There is repetition and a lack of focus, particularly in the second body paragraph. The conclusion restates the position but does not fully synthesize the argument. To improve, clearly state your agreement or disagreement in the introduction, develop each main idea with more detailed explanation and relevant examples, and ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic. Also, proofread for grammatical errors and spelling mistakes (e.g., 'becuase', 'view point', 'passes' should be 'passed').

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, but the flow of ideas is often disrupted by awkward phrasing and unclear connections. The introduction presents the topic but the thesis is vague. The body paragraphs lack clear topic sentences and the progression from historical context to modern relevance is not smooth. Cohesive devices are used sparingly and sometimes incorrectly (e.g., 'In contrast' is used but the contrast is not clear). The conclusion summarizes but does not fully address the prompt. To improve, use clear topic sentences for each paragraph, ensure each paragraph has a single main idea, and use a range of linking words accurately to guide the reader.

Lexical Resource

The essay uses a limited range of vocabulary, with some attempts at less common words (e.g., 'livelihood', 'primary need') but these are often used inaccurately or inappropriately. There are frequent spelling errors (e.g., 'becuase', 'examination', 'important') and word choice issues (e.g., 'this skill' instead of 'these skills', 'passes' instead of 'passed', 'important' instead of 'importance'). The essay lacks sophistication and flexibility in lexical use. To improve, expand vocabulary related to education and skills, use precise terms, and proofread for spelling and word form errors. Pay attention to vocabulary repetition to improve the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors that significantly affect clarity. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'school should give priority' vs 'schools should give'), tense consistency (e.g., 'some people firmly believed' vs 'believe'), article usage (e.g., 'the both view point'), and sentence structure (e.g., 'Due to this , skills such as woodworking and dressmaking passes from one generation to other'). Punctuation is often incorrect, with missing commas and run-on sentences. The range of grammatical structures is limited, with frequent repetition of simple sentences. To improve, focus on mastering basic grammar rules, practice writing complex sentences, and carefully proofread to correct errors.

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Band 4+: Students in school should learn academic subjects and pass exam. Other skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwark can be learnt well from family and friends. Do you agree or disagree?

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Essays On The Same Topic:

Students in school should learn academic subjects and pass exam. Other skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwark can be learnt well from family and friends. Do you agree or disagree?

Students in school should learn academic subjects and pass exam. Other skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwark can be learnt well from family and friends. Do you agree or disagree?

Students in school should learn academic subjects and pass exam. Other skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwark can be learnt well from family and friends. Do you agree or disagree?

Students in school should learn academic subjects and pass exam. Other skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwark can be learnt well from family and friends. Do you agree or disagree?

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In many parts of the world, traditional clothing and hairstyles are significant expressions of cultural identity. Why is it important for people to maintain these aspects of their culture? What challenges might they face when doing so in modern society?

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Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest?

Check Your Own Essay On This Topic?

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