Opinion

Band 4+: Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Note: Both the topic and the essay were created by one of our users.

Nowadays, tourism field has its upward trend. Individuals have traveled more than before, which benefits and enhanced the economies of all countries around the world. In contrast, there are also several damages to local cultures and natural environment that are caused by tourism industries. I totally agree with this statement.

To begin with, there are significant increasing in both of the tourists and the tourism businesses such as travel agencies, hotels, and guides. As a result, tourism has become one of the most significant businesses in numerous countries. However, it also destroy many valuable cultures and environment. For example, some tourists are not respectful to local people and cultural destinations. They might throw their garbages outside the bin provided or draw on the historic objects.

Moreover, environment is also impacted by tourism industries, especially, the beaches’ ecosystem. Several sea creatures have loss their habitats or even their lives due to this reason. As a result of growing tourism industries, boats have been used more often which might be a threat to many animals’ lives. Additionally, the plastic garbages the tourists left also destroy many creatures health.

In conclusion, tourism field have played one of the biggest roles to boost the economies of many countries. On the other hand, it also have significant damages to natural environment and the priceless cultures.

Word Count: 220

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
Continue to challenge and refine your language choices.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

tourism: 7

environment: 4

countries: 3

cultures: 3

industries: 3

significant: 3

tourists: 3

their: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The essay addresses the prompt and presents a clear position. The main ideas are relevant, but there could be more focus and precision in supporting them. To improve, provide more specific examples and develop the arguments further. For instance, elaborate on the types of cultural disrespect or the specific impact of boats on marine life. The essay falls short of the required 250 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The essay demonstrates some organization, but the progression of ideas is not always clear. The introduction could be more focused, and the conclusion feels somewhat repetitive. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs need improvement to enhance the flow of the argument. Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas more effectively.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat limited and lacks precision. There are instances of inaccurate word choice (e.g., "increasing in both of the tourists"). To improve, focus on expanding your vocabulary related to tourism, culture, and environmental issues. Pay attention to using synonyms and collocations appropriately to add depth and nuance to your writing.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The essay contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward phrasing. Sentence structures are relatively simple, limiting the complexity of the arguments presented. To enhance grammatical accuracy, review basic grammar rules and practice constructing more complex sentences. Proofreading carefully is essential.

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