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Band 4+: The graph below shows the proportion of holidays to different destinations which were taken as package holidays by UK residents.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the proportion of holidays to different destinations which were taken as package holidays by UK residents.

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The image displays the proportion of UK residents' package holiday visits abroad from 1993 to 2007: North America starts at 10%, rises to 13% (1995), dips to 10% (2002), and remains stable at 10% till 2007; Europe starts at 45%, fluctuates between 45% to 55% (peaking around 1995-2000 before falling), and steadily declines to 36% by 2007; All other countries starts at 37%, peaks at 40% (1995), maintains around 39%-42% (1997-1999), then slightly declines to 36% in 2005 but increases to 38% by 2007.

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The graphic shows the proportion of holidays to different destinations by UK package holidays residents since 1993 to 2007 which mean that the UK residents have package their holidays visit abroad over 14 years to many country.

The percentages of the UK residents have package their holidays in Europe and reached its peak in 1994 but unfortunately after 2001 there is highly decrease from 50% to 40% and the total is 20% of the decrease of the UK residents package holidays in Europe.

Meanwhile, the percentages of the UK residents package holidays in north America is more stabil than the UK residents package holidays in Europe, there is not a highly decrease in north America like Europe.

Furthermore, the UK peoples also visited their package holidays in other country and reached its peak approximately 62% in 1998 but after 2001 its decreased since 2003 to 2007 but the decrease is not a significant decrease like Europe.

The conclusion is the UK residents has visited Europe, north America, and others country but the biggest downfall of the UK residents in Europe while the others is more stabil especially north America and the others country.

Word Count: 193

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Overall Band Score

4.5

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C2 - Complex
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

holidays: 8

residents: 8

package: 7

decrease: 5

europe: 4

north: 4

america: 4

their: 3

country: 3

others: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to describe the trends in the graph but contains significant inaccuracies and a lack of specific data. The organization is present but not very effective. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data with specific figures and timeframes, and ensure a clear and logical structure.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks a clear overall structure and the progression of ideas is difficult to follow. The introduction is weak and doesn't provide a clear overview of the trends. Paragraphing is present but doesn't effectively separate distinct ideas or time periods. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are often abrupt, hindering the flow of information. To improve coherence, focus on creating a clear thesis statement in the introduction, organizing the body paragraphs around specific trends or time periods, and using transition words to connect ideas smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat limited and repetitive. There's a reliance on basic words and phrases, such as 'highly decrease' and 'more stabil,' which could be expressed more precisely. The report would benefit from a wider range of vocabulary related to trends, proportions, and comparisons. Consider using synonyms and more specific terms to describe changes and relationships in the data. For example, instead of 'highly decrease,' you could use 'significant decline' or 'sharp drop.'

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. These errors frequently impede understanding. There are also issues with article usage and preposition choice. To improve grammatical accuracy, carefully proofread your work, paying attention to verb tenses, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. Consider focusing on mastering basic grammatical structures before attempting more complex constructions.

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