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Band 5+: Some people think that physical strength is important for success in sport, while other people think that mental strength is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. You should write at least 250 words.

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Image for topic: Some people think that physical strength is important for success in sport, while other people think that mental strength is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. You should write at least 250 words.

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The image depicts test structure details comprising four sections: Listening, Reading, Writing, and Speaking. Listening includes 30 min, 4 sections, 40 questions; Reading includes 60 min, 3 sections, 40 questions; Writing involves 60 min, 2 tasks, 400 words; Speaking consists of 11-14 min, 3 parts, conducted face-to-face.

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According to the opinion of different people success in sports depends upon their physical strength or mental strength.Some of them are in favour that physical fitness matters more and others point of view is that people with good mental health play well in different sorts of sports.

Physical strength plays vital role in overall functioning of a person in sports.A person who is physically fit can play well in any type of sports.For example,for the people who take good care of their health can do everything in a perfect manner regarding works related to everyday use.On the other hand,the person who is lazy and is not physically fit cannot play his role in different activities.

Mental strength is also crucial for our performance in everyday life.A person who is physically fit but is not mentally present or else his attenion is towards something else going on in his life cannot play perfectly in different fields of life.For example, a person who is mentally present at the momment going on can perform his tasks in a good manner rather than the one who is physically fit but not mentally available.Stress,anxiety and other different sorts of mental disorders can play a vital role in our daily life.

In my opinion,mental health matters more in performing different tasks.Peace of our mind is far more important than anything going on in our surroundings.If there are a lot of things moving in my mind,I would not be able to complete my tasks.Just like that in sports players with calm and relaxed mind can play well overall among their team.

Word Count: 264

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Overall Band Score

5.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

different: 6

person: 5

physically: 4

people: 3

their: 3

strength: 3

mental: 3

health: 3

mentally: 3

going: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses all parts of the task by discussing both physical and mental strength and providing a personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. The arguments often drift into general life skills rather than focusing specifically on the context of competitive sports. To improve, ensure that examples are more directly related to athletic performance (e.g., discussing endurance or tactical decision-making) and avoid broad generalizations about 'everyday life.' Additionally, work on sentence structure and punctuation to improve the flow of ideas.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a basic structure, addressing both sides of the argument and providing a personal opinion. However, the progression of ideas is somewhat repetitive, and the transitions between sentences are often abrupt. To improve, use a wider variety of cohesive devices (e.g., 'Furthermore', 'In contrast', 'Consequently') to link ideas more smoothly. Additionally, ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic sentence that guides the reader through your argument.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is functional but quite limited and repetitive. Words like 'play well', 'different sorts of', and 'physically fit' are used multiple times throughout the essay. To reach a higher band, aim to use more precise and sophisticated synonyms. For instance, instead of 'play well', you could use 'excel', 'perform optimally', or 'demonstrate high proficiency'. Instead of 'different sorts of', try 'various', 'diverse', or 'a multitude of'.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical issues that affect the flow of the text, including missing articles (e.g., 'plays vital role' should be 'plays a vital role'), subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward phrasing (e.g., 'the person who is lazy and is not physically fit cannot play his role in different activities'). There is also a lack of complex sentence structures. Try to incorporate more subordinate clauses and varied sentence lengths to demonstrate a higher level of grammatical control.

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