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Band 6+: The chart and graph below give information about participants who have entered the Olympics since it began. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting on the main features, make comparision where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: The chart and graph below give information about participants who have entered the Olympics since it began. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting on the main features, make comparision where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

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The image displays two diagrams detailing Olympic participation. The bar graph shows male participants: 1924, 3,000; 1952, 4,000; 1984, 6,000; 2012, 6,000; and female participants: 1924, 100; 1952, 500; 1984, 1,500; 2012, 4,800. The line graph indicates total participants: 1924, 3,100; 1952, 4,500; 1984, 7,500; 2012, 10,800.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The graph and chart provide number of male and female players who have participated in the Olympics games since it started.

Overall, it can clearly be seen from the chart that the ratio of male players went up in all years as compared to female participants. On the other hand, the quantity of male and female participants gradullay increased till 2012.

In 1924, the number of male athletes 3,000 which is higer in comparison with female players. In 1952, the numbers grew from 3,000 male players to around 4,500 and the numbers of female athlete slightly increased which was approximately 500. In the 1984, the male players rose from 4,500 to 5,200 and female players increased from 500 to 1700. In the last and final year numbers of male players peaked at 6,000.

In 1924, the numbers of both male and female participants in the Olympics games was around 3,000. In the 1952, the quantity slightly increased from 3,000 to 4,500. In 1984, numbers increased from 4,500 to around 6,000. In last year, there was a sharp increased in the numbers of male and female participants.

Word Count: 186

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

female: 8

players: 7

increased: 6

numbers: 6

participants: 4

around: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the main trends and makes some comparisons, but there are some inaccuracies in the data reported. To improve, ensure data accuracy and vary your language to describe trends and comparisons more effectively.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates an adequate attempt to organize the information, but there are some inconsistencies in paragraphing and flow. The separation of male/female data and total participant data into separate paragraphs is a good strategy, but the transitions between years within each paragraph could be smoother. Consider using transition words or phrases to link the data points more effectively. For example, phrases like 'Following this' or 'Subsequently' could improve the flow. Also, avoid repetition by combining similar points.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is generally appropriate, but there's room for improvement in terms of variety and precision. For instance, using synonyms for 'increased' (e.g., 'grew', 'rose', 'surged') can make the writing more engaging. Also, be careful with word choice; 'quantity' is not the best fit for describing the number of participants. 'Number' or 'proportion' would be more suitable. Try to incorporate a wider range of vocabulary related to trends and comparisons. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Subject-verb agreement errors (e.g., 'the number of male athletes 3,000') and incorrect tense usage are present. Sentence structure could also be improved for better flow and clarity. For example, some sentences are a bit fragmented or lack a clear subject. Proofreading carefully for these types of errors is essential. Also, ensure correct use of articles (a, an, the) and prepositions.

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