Bar Chart

Band 6+: The chart below shows the results of a survey in percentage terms comparing the participation in various home activities among young people aged 11 to 16 in four countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant Write at least 150 words.

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Image for topic: The chart below shows the results of a survey in percentage terms comparing the participation in various home activities among young people aged 11 to 16 in four countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant Write at least 150 words.

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The image depicts a survey showing percentages of home activities among young individuals aged 11 to 16 in four countries: England, Scotland, Ireland, Wales. England: Computer Games 50%, Reading 30%, Board Games 50%, Watching TV 75%. Scotland: Computer Games 60%, Reading 25%, Board Games 40%, Watching TV 60%. Ireland: Computer Games 45%, Reading 25%, Board Games 35%, Watching TV 45%. Wales: Computer Games 55%, Reading 35%, Board Games 45%, Watching TV 70%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The bar chart illustrates some common recreational pastimes at home among the 11-16 age group according to different countries. In general, computer games play the most dominant role among all countries, while the lowest percentage is recorded in reading in Wales and Ireland. Another striking feature is that watching TV is witnessed as an almost static figure.

At 60%, the young people in Wales share their most interest in computer games, followed closely by approximately 52% of people in Wales. Moreover, this activity is also dominant compared to others in Scotland and England, ranging from 40% to 50%. In terms of Watching TV, the figure which maintains its proportion of 30%, in most countries, except for Wales, recorded a rough 1% disparity.

Regarding reading pursuit, which is most popular in Scotland and England, twice as much as that of Wales and Ireland, at around 11%. Additionally, the figure for board games reached its peak at 30% in Wales, about 5% to 10% higher than other countries.

Word Count: 166

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

wales: 6

countries: 4

games: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report identifies some main features but contains inaccuracies and some misinterpretations of the data. The writing is not always clear, and there are issues with the accuracy of the data presented. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data and ensuring that comparisons are precise and supported by the visual information. Also, pay attention to clarity and organization to present a more coherent summary.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has some coherence issues. The information is not always presented in a logical order, and the connections between sentences and paragraphs could be clearer. For example, the shift from computer games to watching TV in the second paragraph feels abrupt. Consider using transition words and phrases to guide the reader through the data and ensure a smoother flow of information. Also, paragraphing could be improved to group related ideas more effectively.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a reasonable range of vocabulary, but there are opportunities to enhance it further. Some phrases are a bit awkward or imprecise (e.g., "static figure," "share their most interest"). Try to use more varied and precise language to describe the data and trends. For instance, instead of "static figure," you could say "relatively consistent" or "shows less variation." Also, avoid informal language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors and inaccuracies. For example, "computer games play the most dominant role" is not grammatically correct; it should be "computer games play the most dominant role" or "computer games are the most popular activity." Also, "At 60%, the young people in Wales share their most interest in computer games, followed closely by approximately 52% of people in Wales" is unclear and contains a grammatical error. Pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence structure. Proofread carefully to identify and correct these errors.

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