Pie Chart

Band 4+: The chart show the distribution of money spent on music in three different years in northern lreland

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The image shows pie charts depicting the distribution of money spent on music in Northern Ireland for the years 2005, 2008, and 2011. In 2005: CDs 61%, Concerts 31%, Digital downloads 6%, Other sources 2%. In 2008: CDs 43%, Concerts 23%, Digital downloads 32%, Other sources 2%. In 2011: CDs 26%, Concerts 28%, Digital downloads 43%, Other sources 3%.

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The three pie charts illustrates the persentage of spent money in three various years,begin with 2005 and ending with 2011 on song

Overall,there are different ways,which money was spent,such as Cds,concerts,digital downloads,other sources.The highest spending of cash was in concerts,meanwhile the lowest one was other sources.

in 2005 in concerts had 31%,in the next 3 years it has decreased by 23%,however dropping wasn’t stopped and it has fell to 28% in 2011.The digital downloads had 31% in 2005,it was only 6%,which almost lowest one,it is really lower for 5-6 time,compared to concerts percantage.

The Cds in 2011 had the lowest number of spent money with 61%,unfortunatelly it has sharply redused in 2008 to 20%.About 2005 it has declined by 26%.In other cources was the lowest one,in 2005 and 2008 the numer was math,however in 2011 it has rose for 1% and has became 3%.

Word Count: 144

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

lowest: 4

money: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task, but there are some inaccuracies and a lack of clarity. The organization could be improved by grouping information more effectively. For example, discussing each category (CDs, Concerts, etc.) across the years would provide a clearer comparison. Also, ensure that all data points are accurately represented and avoid misinterpretations. Proofread carefully to correct grammatical errors and improve sentence structure. The report falls short of the required 150 words.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report lacks clear organization and logical flow. The information is presented in a somewhat disorganized manner, making it difficult to follow the trends and comparisons between the years. Paragraphing is present but doesn't effectively separate distinct ideas or aspects of the data. To improve coherence, consider structuring the report with a clear introduction, body paragraphs focusing on specific trends or categories, and a concise conclusion. Use cohesive devices (e.g., transition words, pronouns) to link ideas and sentences together smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and lacks precision. There are instances of imprecise word choice (e.g., "persentage," "song," "cash," "math," "cources"). To enhance lexical resource, try to use a wider range of vocabulary related to trends, proportions, and changes. Use synonyms and more specific terms to describe the data accurately. For example, instead of "spent money," consider using "expenditure" or "spending." Instead of "dropping wasn't stopped," try "the decline continued." Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including incorrect verb tenses, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. There are also errors in spelling and punctuation. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on using a variety of sentence structures correctly. Pay attention to verb tenses and ensure they are consistent throughout the report. Proofread carefully to identify and correct errors in spelling, punctuation, and grammar.

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Band 4+: The chart show the distribution of money spent on music in three different years in northern lreland

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Answers On The Same Topic:

The chart show the distribution of money spent on music in three different years in northern lreland

The chart show the distribution of money spent on music in three different years in northern lreland

The chart show the distribution of money spent on music in three different years in northern lreland

The chart show the distribution of money spent on music in three different years in northern lreland

The chart show the distribution of money spent on music in three different years in northern lreland

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