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Band 4+: The graph above shows the stock price of four technology companies between 2011 and 2016.

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Image for topic: The graph above shows the stock price of four technology companies between 2011 and 2016.

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The image depicts a line graph with four fluctuating lines representing data over a period of 2011-2016; Facebook (2011:10,000, 2012:5,000, 2013:0, 2014:15,000, 2015:10,000, 2016:10,000), Google (2011:0, 2012:5,000, 2013:5,000, 2014:10,000, 2015:20,000, 2016:30,000), Apple (2011:0, 2012:0, 2013:35,000, 2014:5,000, 2015:5,000, 2016:5,000), Yahoo (2011:0, 2012:0, 2013:5,000, 2014:0, 2015:0, 2016:0).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The graph depicts the retail price of four different technology companies in the years between 2011 and 2016; including Facebook, Google, Apple, and Yahoo.

First of all, one technology company that their stock price was remained steady during 5 years was Google; with around 250. Then, Apple started with price range approximately 5,000 and It reached its peak in 2012 with 35,000. Apparently, It decreased to the started price in 2013 and saw fluctuation for the remaining years. Following that, Facebook began with around 7,500 and the stock fee was gradually increased to 20,000. Lastly, Yahoo’s retail price was started with around 6,000 and it decreased till the 2014. Then remained steady for one year and again decreased in the years 2015 to 2016.

Overall, Apple saw the most increase above of all of 4 companies; with around 30,000 even though it decreased again. Google kept the same price for the years between 2011 and 2016.

Word Count: 156

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

price: 6

years: 5

around: 4

decreased: 4

apple: 3

started: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to address the task by describing the stock prices of four technology companies over the given period. However, it contains significant inaccuracies and misinterpretations of the data, such as misstating Google's price as steady around 250, Apple's peak in 2012, and Facebook's increase to 20,000. The overall trend description is also incorrect, stating Apple saw the most increase when the data shows Google had the highest growth. The report would benefit from carefully reviewing the visual information to ensure key data points and trends are accurately represented, and from avoiding irrelevant or incorrect details.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report has a basic structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and an overall summary. However, the flow of information is somewhat disjointed, and the progression of ideas is not always logical. For example, the description of Apple's data jumps between years without a clear sequence. The use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes inaccurate (e.g., 'First of all' followed by 'Then' and 'Following that' without clear connection). Paragraphing could be improved to group related information more effectively. To enhance coherence, consider organizing the report by comparing trends across companies or by time periods, and use a wider range of linking words and phrases to guide the reader smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with limited range. Terms like 'price', 'started', 'decreased', and 'increased' are used frequently without variation. There are also inaccuracies, such as 'retail price' instead of 'stock price', 'stock fee' instead of 'stock price', and 'above of all' instead of 'among all'. The report would benefit from using more precise and varied vocabulary related to trends (e.g., 'plummeted', 'surged', 'fluctuated', 'stabilized') and more formal language suitable for an academic report. Avoid informal phrasing like 'saw fluctuation' and aim for more sophisticated lexical choices. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains several grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that affect clarity. Examples include 'one technology company that their stock price was remained steady' (incorrect relative pronoun and passive voice), 'It decreased to the started price' (unclear meaning), and 'Apple saw the most increase above of all of 4 companies' (incorrect preposition and article usage). Sentence structures are mostly simple, with limited use of complex sentences. Punctuation is inconsistent, such as missing commas after introductory phrases. To improve, focus on using a mix of simple and complex sentence structures correctly, and ensure subject-verb agreement and proper use of articles and prepositions. Proofreading for common errors would also help.

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Band 4+: The graph above shows the stock price of four technology companies between 2011 and 2016.

Check Your Answer On This Topic?

Generate A Band-9 Sample Answer?

Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Answers On The Same Topic:

The graph above shows the stock price of four technology companies between 2011 and 2016.

The graph above shows the stock price of four technology companies between 2011 and 2016.

The graph above shows the stock price of four technology companies between 2011 and 2016.

The graph above shows the stock price of four technology companies between 2011 and 2016.

Other Topics:

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

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