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Band 4+: The graph and table details the information about proportion of graduates in Australia who worked full-time after university in the period between 2004 and 2012

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The image presents a line graph and a table depicting data on graduates in Australia from 2004 to 2012. The graph shows the percentage of full-time workers with a university degree: in 2004, all graduates - 59%, mathematics graduates - 60%; in 2006, all graduates - 68%, mathematics graduates - 70%; in 2008, all graduates - 78%, mathematics graduates - 76%; in 2010, all graduates - 80%, mathematics graduates - 75%; and in 2012, both categories at 73%. The accompanying table outlines average salaries for graduates: in 2004, math and other graduates each received $41,000; in 2006, both received $43,500; in 2008, math graduates earned $51,500, other graduates $48,000; in 2010, math graduates earned $48,500, other graduates $52,000; and in 2012, math graduates earned $59,000, other graduates $53,000.

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The graph and table demostrates data about the percentage of graduates in Australia who worked full-time after high education from 2004 to 2012. Overall, there are not as much changings from the begging till the middle, but after a half of period it starts modifying.

In the begining of span, in 2004, maths graduaters came up with approximately 65%, while other ones accurately conducted of 80%. The salary, however, in both categories is similar and accounted for 41,000 dollars. Four years later indicator showed that as maths as other alumnuses experienced a slight rose and counted with roughly 85 percent. Despite this, salaries amount was totally various. While mathematical specialists had been earning 51,500 dollars, otherwise school-leavers got $48,000.

In 2014 both sectors’ index declined and maths graduators returned to the same level in 65% as it was in 2004. In addition, other alumnuses dropped to 75% and the salary amounted to $53,000 and maths graduators was $59,000.

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Overall Band Score

4.5

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Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
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Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

maths: 4

other: 3

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Task Response

The report attempts to address the task but contains inaccuracies and omissions. The data is not always accurately represented, and there are some misunderstandings of the information presented in the graph and table. The organization could be improved for clarity. To improve, focus on accurately representing the data, ensuring correct figures and trends are identified. Also, enhance the structure by clearly separating different aspects of the data (e.g., percentage of full-time workers vs. average salaries) into distinct paragraphs.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report demonstrates some attempt to organize the information, but the overall structure is weak. The progression of ideas is not always logical, and the connections between sentences and paragraphs are often unclear. The report lacks clear signposting to guide the reader through the data. Paragraphing is inconsistent, and the introduction and conclusion are underdeveloped. To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on creating a clear and logical structure with well-defined paragraphs, using cohesive devices to link ideas, and providing a clear introduction and conclusion.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a limited range of vocabulary, with some inaccuracies and inappropriate word choices. There is some attempt to use more complex vocabulary, but this is not always successful. The report relies heavily on simple vocabulary and lacks the precision and sophistication needed to effectively describe the data. To improve lexical resource, focus on expanding your vocabulary related to describing trends, comparisons, and data analysis. Pay attention to the correct usage and meaning of words, and avoid using overly simplistic or informal language.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors, including errors in verb tense, subject-verb agreement, article usage, and sentence structure. These errors significantly affect the clarity and accuracy of the report. The range of grammatical structures used is limited, and there is a lack of control over more complex structures. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, focus on reviewing basic grammar rules and practicing sentence construction. Pay attention to common errors and seek feedback on your writing to identify areas for improvement.

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