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Band 6+: The graph below shows the percentage of people who traveled by bus in thr UK from 2009 to 2011.

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Image for topic: The graph below shows the percentage of people who traveled by bus in thr UK from 2009 to 2011.

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The image contains a table with percentages of people who traveled by bus in the UK from 2009 to 2011; for 2009: Shopping 65%, Study 4%, Work 5%, Visiting friends 19%, Day tour 7%; for 2010: Shopping 56%, Study 9%, Work 2%, Visiting friends 19%, Day tour 12%; for 2011: Shopping 51%, Study 9%, Work 2%, Visiting friends 23%, Day tour 12%.

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The given table graph illustrates the proportion of individuals who travelled by bus in different purposes in the UK between 2009 and 2011. Overall, it is clear that shopping accounted for a higher proportion of people travelling by bus than the other categories.

It can be seen from the graph that in the year 2009, the greatest proportion of people traveling by bus was on shopping, which represented 65% of travellers, while in the year 2010 and 2011, the figure for these categories were exactly 56% and 51% of travelers. This figure experienced significant increase from 56% in 2010 to 51% in 2011.

Study and day tour travel by bus had an almost similar trend, in both 2010 and 2011. The percentage of people who travelled by bus for work, standing at 5% in 2009. This figure witnessed a significant decrease to 2% in 2010. In addition, the percentage of travellers remained constant between 2009 and 2010 at 19%, before rising slightly to 23% in 2011.

Word Count: 166

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

proportion: 3

people: 3

figure: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the main requirements of the task and identifies the primary trend (shopping being the most popular reason). However, there are several issues with data accuracy and logical consistency that affect the clarity of the response. For instance, the report states that the figure for shopping experienced a 'significant increase' from 56% to 51%, which is mathematically a decrease. Additionally, some sentences are incomplete or lack a subject (e.g., the sentence regarding work travel), and certain categories are mentioned without being clearly linked to their specific data points (e.g., the sentence regarding 'visiting friends' is missing the category name). To improve, ensure that all trends (increases vs. decreases) are described accurately and that every sentence is grammatically complete.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report follows a logical structure with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. However, there are issues with the flow of information. Some sentences feel disconnected, particularly in the final paragraph where the subject of the '19%' figure is not explicitly mentioned (it is implied to be 'visiting friends' but never stated). To improve, ensure that every sentence has a clear subject and that transitions between different categories of data are smoother.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is adequate for describing trends (e.g., 'accounted for', 'witnessed a significant decrease'), but there is some repetition and imprecise usage. For example, 'the figure for these categories' is used when referring to a single category (shopping). Additionally, the phrase 'travelled by bus in different purposes' should be 'for different purposes'. Aim to use a wider variety of synonyms for 'people' and 'percentage' to avoid repetition. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical issues that affect the clarity of the report. There is a significant error in logic/grammar where it states a figure 'experienced significant increase from 56% in 2010 to 51% in 2011' (a decrease from 56 to 51 is not an increase). There are also sentence fragments, such as 'The percentage of people who travelled by bus for work, standing at 5% in 2009.', which lacks a main verb. Ensure that every sentence is a complete thought and that mathematical directions (increase vs. decrease) are used accurately.

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