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Band 4+: The graphs show the post - qualifications held by Australians in the age groups 25 to 34 and 55 to 69.

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The image contains two pie charts detailing post-school qualifications for different age groups. The first chart represents 837,500 Australians aged 25-34 with degrees: Science, Maths, IT 20.24%; Engineering 13.17%; Medicine 5.73%; Law 2.48%; Social Sciences, Arts 30.11%; Architecture 3.34%; Veterinary, Agriculture 2.96%; Education 11.35%; Administration 7.61%; Other 2.00%. The second chart details 104,805 aged 55-69: Science, Maths, IT 19.48%; Engineering 7.40%; Medicine 4.82%; Law 2.24%; Social Sciences, Arts 14.76%; Architecture 9.36%; Veterinary, Agriculture 3.26%; Education 18.19%; Administration 19.08%; Other 1.40%.

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Provided are two pie charts illustrating Australian post-school degree in different age groups, including 25 – 34 and 55 – 69.

Overall, at the age 25 to 34 represent 357,500 Australians receive qualifications and the age 55 to 69 contribute to 104,800. Furthermore, the field social sciences, arts in both age groups still significantly possesses the greatest statistics while veterinary, agriculture; architecture; law and other categories hit the lowest point.

The age from 25 to 34 and from 55 to 69 report social sciences, arts remarkably account for the highest data, 19.48% and 20.42%, respectively. Then, the following figure of the highest is administration represent 19.08% and science, maths, information technology with 18.19% for the age group 25-34. On the other pie chart is engineering which account for 19.27% and administration possess 14.90%.

Regarding the minimal proportion is include 4 fields. The lowest in age group 25 to 34 is architecture, making up 1.85% and for another age group is veterinary, agriculture, occupying 2.00%.

Word Count: 164

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
B2 - Upper Intermediate
Opt for even more advanced words when appropriate.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

group: 3

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Task Response

The report attempts to address the task and provides a comparison between the two age groups. However, there are significant issues with data accuracy and clarity. Many of the percentages cited in the report do not match the data provided in the visual description (for example, the report mentions 19.48% and 20.42% for Social Sciences, whereas the description provides different figures). Additionally, the grouping of information is sometimes confusing, making it difficult to follow which statistic belongs to which age group. To improve, ensure that every data point is accurately transcribed from the charts and focus on organizing the comparison logically, perhaps by grouping similar trends together rather than listing figures sporadically.

Coherence & Cohesion

The organization of the report is somewhat logical, but the progression of ideas is frequently interrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. While you attempt to use cohesive devices (e.g., 'Overall', 'Furthermore', 'Regarding'), they do not always function effectively because the sentences themselves are difficult to parse. To improve, focus on using clearer transition signals and ensuring that each sentence follows a logical subject-verb-object structure to help the reader follow your comparisons more easily.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is somewhat repetitive and often used incorrectly in context. For example, phrases like 'possesses the greatest statistics' or 'the following figure of the highest is' are unnatural in English academic writing. You should aim to use more precise verbs for describing data, such as 'comprised', 'accounted for', 'constituted', or 'represented'. Additionally, ensure that the terms used to describe categories are used accurately without unnecessary filler words.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

Grammatical errors are frequent and significantly impact the clarity of the report. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'administration represent'), sentence structure (e.g., 'the age 25 to 34 represent...'), and the use of prepositions. Many sentences are fragmented or run-on. I recommend practicing complex sentence structures, specifically relative clauses (e.g., 'which accounted for...') and comparative structures (e.g., 'higher than', 'the most significant being...'), to improve your ability to convey data accurately.

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Band 4+: The graphs show the post - qualifications held by Australians in the age groups 25 to 34 and 55 to 69.

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Answers On The Same Topic:

The graphs show the post – qualifications held by Australians in the age groups 25 to 34 and 55 to 69.

The graphs show the post – qualifications held by Australians in the age groups 25 to 34 and 55 to 69.

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