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Band 4+: The maps show the changes in Shalton village from 1910 to 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

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Image for topic: The maps show the changes in Shalton village from 1910 to 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

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The image shows two maps of Shalton village, one in 1910 and the other in 2010, with marked changes in the number and types of buildings. In 1910, the village had 10 houses, a post office, three large houses, and four shops on High Street (grocer, baker, tailor, and chemist). By 2010, the number of houses increased to 18, the large houses reduced to two, and the shops were replaced by a cafe. The post office remained in the same location on both maps.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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Note: Both the topic and the answer were created by one of our users.

The given map compares the development of the village between 1910 and 2010.

Overall, there are lots of facilities that had been moved such as Large house, Baker, Butcher, Grocer and also trees. village was evolved to residential area thanks to houses, Cafe, Supermarket Parking, and Bank that had been added. However, amenities like School and Post office remained unchange.

The facilities like Large house and Baker located in centre were replaced by houses and small road, and Grocer located in the south-west side of the map by Cafe. There are 7 houses have been built beside of the narrrow road. However, only one house that located in the middle part of south of the map.

Strarting with replaced house that located in north-west part by Bank. Furthermore, the Butcher beside the house were destroyed, then big Supermarket Parking were built. School in south-west side remained as well as Post office in north-east part of the map. Notably, a lot of houses have been built in Post office row as well as in the south part.

Word Count: 176

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Overall Band Score

4.5

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
B1 - Intermediate
Using more sophisticated words could be beneficial.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

house: 5

houses: 4

located: 4

office: 3

built: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report addresses the task by describing the main changes in Shalton village from 1910 to 2010. It provides an overview and mentions several key developments, such as the increase in houses, the replacement of shops with a cafe, and the addition of new facilities. However, there are some inaccuracies and omissions. For instance, the report mentions a 'Butcher' and 'Grocer' which are not in the visual description, and it incorrectly states that the school remained unchanged, whereas the description only mentions the post office remaining. Additionally, the report includes some irrelevant details (e.g., 'trees') and has minor grammatical errors. To improve, focus on accurately reporting the data from the visual, avoid introducing unmentioned details, and ensure a clear, logical structure with precise comparisons.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report attempts to describe the changes but lacks a clear and logical structure. The information is presented in a somewhat disjointed manner, making it difficult to follow the sequence of changes. Paragraphing is not effectively managed, and the use of cohesive devices is limited and sometimes inaccurate. To improve, organize the report into clear paragraphs: one for the overview and one for the detailed changes. Use a logical order, such as describing changes from the center outward or from north to south, and employ a range of linking words (e.g., 'in contrast', 'similarly', 'while') to connect ideas smoothly.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with limited range and flexibility. There are several inaccuracies and inappropriate word choices (e.g., 'unchange' instead of 'unchanged', 'narrrow' instead of 'narrow', 'Strarting' instead of 'Starting'). The report lacks the sophisticated and precise vocabulary expected for a higher band score. To improve, expand your vocabulary related to maps and changes (e.g., 'relocated', 'converted', 'demolished', 'constructed', 'expanded') and ensure correct spelling and word forms. Practice using synonyms to avoid repetition. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report contains numerous grammatical errors and awkward phrasing that significantly hinder clarity. Issues include incorrect verb tenses (e.g., 'had been moved'), subject-verb agreement errors, missing articles, and fragmented sentences. Punctuation is also problematic. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence structures, using the correct tense (past simple for changes), and ensuring subject-verb agreement. Proofread carefully to eliminate errors. Practice writing simple, clear sentences before attempting more complex structures.

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