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Band 7+: The pictures below shows the use of renewable energy accounting the total energy from 1971 to 2011?

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The image depicts renewable energy use as a percentage of total energy from 1971 to 2011 for six countries: Finland ranges ~23.5% to ~16% (1971-2011); Denmark ranges ~3% to ~17% (1971-2011); France ranges ~7% to ~8.5% (1971-2011); Germany ranges ~7% to ~10% (1971-2011); United States ranges ~2% to ~4% (1971-2011); United Kingdom ranges ~0.5% to ~3% (1971-2011).

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The line graph illustrates renewable energy usage accounting the total energy over four decades, between 1971 and 2011, measured in percentage.

Overall, it is evident that figure for Finland continuously ranked the first, while the United Kingdom’s place remained the lowest. Additionally, the most fluctuated periods were for Denmark and the US.

Starting with Finland’s proportion, which stood at almost 25% at the beginning, fell to its lowest point at just above 15% between 1986 and 1991, before reaching its peak by 2011. Following with Denmark, which underwent the extreme fluctuations between about 1981 and 1991, and subsequently increased moderately by the end of the period. The same pattern was observed for the Us, which fluctuated notably by 1991 and then saw a significant growth at around 20%.

The opposite pattern was recorded for the remained countries – the UK, France and Germany, which had relatively moderate trends. The United Kingdom recorded almost a moderate upward trajectory by 2011, while France and Germany both had a slight decrease between 1981 and 1991 before increasing dramatically by 2011.

Word Count: 177

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Overall Band Score

(+/- 0.5)

Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

between: 4

which: 4

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report appropriately addresses the task by describing the main trends and comparing the countries. It provides an overview and highlights key features, such as Finland's leading position and the UK's lowest usage. However, there are some inaccuracies and omissions: the US is described as reaching around 20%, which is incorrect (it should be around 4%), and the final trends for France and Germany are not accurately described (they did not increase dramatically). Additionally, some phrases are awkward or unclear (e.g., 'accounting the total energy', 'the most fluctuated periods', 'the remained countries'). To improve, ensure data accuracy and use clearer, more precise language.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally well-organized with a clear overall trend statement and a logical progression from the highest to the lowest performing countries. However, there are some minor lapses in cohesion, such as the use of 'the Us' instead of 'the US' and the phrase 'the remained countries' which could be more naturally expressed as 'the remaining countries'. Additionally, the transition between the second and third paragraphs could be smoother to enhance the flow of ideas.

Lexical Resource

The report demonstrates a good range of vocabulary with appropriate use of terms like 'fluctuated', 'moderate upward trajectory', and 'significant growth'. However, there are some inaccuracies and awkward phrasings, such as 'accounting the total energy' (should be 'accounting for the total energy') and 'the most fluctuated periods' (better as 'the most significant fluctuations'). The use of 'underwent the extreme fluctuations' is slightly unnatural; 'experienced significant fluctuations' would be more idiomatic. Overall, the lexical resource is adequate but could be more precise and natural.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report uses a variety of sentence structures, including complex sentences with subordinate clauses, which is commendable. However, there are several grammatical errors and punctuation issues that affect clarity. For example, 'the figure for Finland continuously ranked the first' should be 'the figure for Finland consistently ranked first'. Also, 'which stood at almost 25% at the beginning, fell to its lowest point' lacks a clear subject-verb agreement; it should be 'which stood at almost 25% at the beginning, fell to its lowest point...' but the subject 'which' refers to 'proportion', so it is acceptable. The phrase 'the Us' should be 'the US', and 'the remained countries' should be 'the remaining countries'. These errors, while not frequent, do detract from the overall grammatical accuracy.

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Band 7+: The pictures below shows the use of renewable energy accounting the total energy from 1971 to 2011?

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Task Response

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The pictures below shows the use of renewable energy accounting the total energy from 1971 to 2011?

The pictures below shows the use of renewable energy accounting the total energy from 1971 to 2011?

The pictures below shows the use of renewable energy accounting the total energy from 1971 to 2011?

The pictures below shows the use of renewable energy accounting the total energy from 1971 to 2011?

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