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Band 6+: The pie chart show the percentage of the working day adults spend doing different activities in a country in 1958 and 2008

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The image presents two pie charts depicting percentages of daily activities: in 1958, relaxing at home 8%, working 33%, sleeping 32%, going out 19%, traveling to work 2%, other activities 6%; in 2008, relaxing at home 13%, working 40%, sleeping 25%, going out 6%, traveling to work 8%, other activities 8%.

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The charts illustrate the percentage of the working hour that workers spend in different activities in a country between 1958 and 2008.

Overall, working had the largest part above any activities, followed by sleeping, going out (with friend or family), relaxing at home, and other.

In 1958, working became the majority of people doing at the working hour, which took a third (33%) of the overall. It increased to 50% in 2008. Sleeping had the second place, which start at less than a third (32%) in 1958, and it decreased to a quarter (25%) in 2008. Going out, whether with friends or family, started at less than a fifth (19%) in 1958, and it climbed down to less than a tenth (6%) in 2008.

Relaxing at home, on the other side, started at less than a tenth (8%) in 1958, and it climbed up to more than a tenth (13%) in 2008. Travelling to work depleated at 2% in 1958, and it rose to 6% in 2008. For other, it began at 6% in 1958 and it remained the same until 2008.

Word Count: 182

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
A2 - Upper Beginner
Consider using more varied and advanced words.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

working: 4

tenth: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report covers the requirements of the task, providing a general overview and specific details from the pie charts. However, there are some inaccuracies in the data reported (e.g., the working percentage in 2008). To improve, ensure all data cited is accurate and consider grouping some categories to avoid a long list of individual comparisons. Also, the introduction could be more precise, referring to 'a country' rather than generalizing to all workers.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally understandable, but the organization could be improved. Consider grouping similar trends together (e.g., activities that increased vs. those that decreased). The flow between sentences could also be smoother with better use of cohesive devices. For example, use transition words to link ideas between sentences and paragraphs.

Lexical Resource

The vocabulary is adequate but could be more precise and varied. Avoid repetitive phrases like 'started at' and 'in 1958'. Use synonyms and more descriptive language to enhance the report. For instance, instead of 'climbed down', consider 'decreased significantly'. Boost vocabulary complexity to elevate the overall score.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

There are several grammatical errors that affect clarity. Pay attention to subject-verb agreement, correct tense usage, and article usage ('the', 'a'). For example, 'working became the majority of people doing' is grammatically incorrect. Also, 'depleated' is not the correct word; consider using 'decreased' or 'fell'.

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Band 6+: The pie chart show the percentage of the working day adults spend doing different activities in a country in 1958 and 2008

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Overall Band Score

Task Response

Coherence & Cohesion

Lexical Resource

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Answers On The Same Topic:

The pie chart show the percentage of the working day adults spend doing different activities in a country in 1958 and 2008

The pie chart show the percentage of the working day adults spend doing different activities in a country in 1958 and 2008

The pie chart show the percentage of the working day adults spend doing different activities in a country in 1958 and 2008

The pie chart show the percentage of the working day adults spend doing different activities in a country in 1958 and 2008

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