Pie Chart

Band 7+: The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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Image for topic: The table and charts below give information on the police budget for 2017 and 2018 in one area of Britain. The table shows where the money came from and the charts show how it was distributed. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The image shows two pie charts labeled "2017" and "2018" illustrating how money was spent, with percentages for Salaries (officers and staff), Technology, and Buildings and transport; in 2017, Salaries were 75%, Technology 17%, and Buildings 8%, in 2018 Salaries decreased to 69%, Technology increased to 17%, and Buildings increased to 14%.

Given the complexity of the image, the above description may not be entirely accurate.

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The pie charts above illustrate the sources of police budget in a specific area in Britian while comparing how the budget was spent in the span of one year from 2017 and 2018.

notably, salaries of officers and staff remained the biggest spending out of the three, while the budget dedicated for buildings and transport remained the same, and lastly, it is evident that the department’s focus on technology increased, with the dedicated budget increasing from 8% in 2017 to 14% in 2018.

overall, it is apparent that external factors affected the budget plan of the police department. The decrease in budget spent on salaries from 75% in 2017 to 69% may be due to economic changes that affect wages. And the increase of the budget on technology may be linked to the constant innovations that improve the speed of invistagations or even make life easier for officers working on their desktops. But the percentage of the spent budget on buildings and transport remained unchanged.

Word Count: 165

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Overall Band Score

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Vocabulary Complexity:
C1 - Intricate
Strive to incorporate even richer and more precise language.

Grammar Mistakes: N/A

Vocabulary Repetition:

budget: 8

spent: 3

remained: 3

Try using synonyms for the above words

Task Response

The report attempts to summarise the information provided, but it does not fully address the task requirements. The introduction mentions the sources of the budget, which are not detailed in the provided description. The main body of the report focuses on the spending, but the comparison between the two years is not consistently clear, and some key figures are omitted or inaccurately represented. For instance, the report states that the budget for buildings and transport remained the same, which contradicts the provided description. Additionally, the report makes assumptions about external factors influencing the budget, which is not supported by the visual data. To improve, ensure all key data points from the visuals are accurately reported and compared, and avoid speculation about reasons for changes unless explicitly stated in the data.

Coherence & Cohesion

The report is generally easy to follow, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. However, the organisation of ideas within the body could be improved. The comparison between the two years is somewhat disjointed, and the paragraphing could be more effective in grouping related information. For better cohesion, try to use comparative language more consistently and structure your paragraphs to present a clear overview of the changes over time.

Lexical Resource

The report uses a range of vocabulary, and there is an attempt to use more sophisticated language. However, there are some inaccuracies and less appropriate word choices. For example, 'span of one year' is a bit informal, and 'invistagations' is misspelled. To enhance lexical resource, focus on using precise vocabulary related to data description and comparison, and ensure accurate spelling and usage.

Grammatical Range & Accuracy

The report demonstrates a range of grammatical structures, but there are some errors in grammar and punctuation that occasionally impede clarity. For instance, there are issues with subject-verb agreement and sentence construction. While the report uses some complex sentences, they are not always error-free. To achieve a higher score, pay closer attention to grammatical accuracy, including verb tenses, prepositions, and punctuation, and aim for more consistent control over sentence structures.

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